Jensen hated Chris. A lot. He was going to fucking kill Chris as soon as his head stopped pounding. He was also going to make sure Chris never got laid again.
"I told you to stop drinking a hundred times." Chris shoved his shoulder again. "Where's your boy?"
"Home." Jensen rolled over to face the wall.
"Home? You wanna tell me why he took off?" Chris grabbed his shoulder to pull him over, but Jensen managed to shove him off.
"Why'd your girl leave already?"
"She left last night when her friend wanted to go home, but I got her number." Chris pulled on his arm until he rolled over onto his back. "So why'd your boy go home?"
"He had to take his brother's truck back. He woke me up when he was leaving this morning so it's not like he just snuck off. Can I go back to sleep, now?"
"When's he coming back to town?" Chris couldn't just shut up and let him sleep.
"The fourth, maybe? I don't fucking know. He was still trying to decide the last time I asked him. And I'm not calling him now, because he probably went back to sleep after he got home. Like I'm going back to sleep now. So shut the fuck up and leave me alone."
"If you don't bring him over, I'm just gonna go find him. I know where he lives."
"I'll bring him over, okay? Just give me some time after he gets back." Jensen turned his head to look at Chris. The last thing he needed was Chris making Jared think he was a freak.
"How much time are we talkin' about?"
"A couple weeks or so, after we get everything settled for the next semester." If he could make it until midterms, Chris wouldn't bug him then. Chris would never actually stress him out when he needed to study.
"Two weeks? You've been dating him for a month already. You never let me get past two dates with a girl you haven't met."
"Man, you were in Oklahoma for two weeks. That's not my fault and you met him last night." And unlike the girls Chris dated, Jared wasn't a brainless bimbo.
"For two minutes. That doesn't count and you know it."
"Chris."
"I'll be decent if you bring him over next week. I'll be sober. We'll just hang out. You can even invite Mike and Lexi to protect him."
~*~
To: Pete
From: Jensen
Subject: Re: New Years
Jared showed. He was only here for about 8 hours, but he showed up.
~*~
To: Jensen
From: Pete
Subject: Re: Re: New Years
I KNOW. It's a good thing Mike can take videos, because you sucked at telling that story.
IT WAS HOT.
~*~
Jensen wasn't listening for Jared's brother to leave. That would be lame and pathetic, especially considering that he'd seen Jared four days ago. He also wasn't pacing around his room because he missed Jared. He missed Jared's dick. That was a lot more respectable.
"And you say I'm fucked in the head? Please tell me you haven't said something like that to Jared?" Lexi turned on her side to look at him from her place on his bed.
"What? No. I'm not a total idiot."
"You are if you think you really miss his dick more than you miss him. It'd make way more sense if you just admitted you're in love with him."
"What?" There was no fucking way he'd been drunk enough to say that out loud even on New Years.
"Oh come on, you know it. You're not that slow." When Jensen shrugged and didn't answer, Lexi sat up. "Okay. Stop freaking out. It's going to be fine. Just because he hasn't said it yet, doesn't mean you have to panic."
"He's Jared. He'd have said it."
"Okay, probably, but that doesn't mean he's not going to fall in love with you. Give him some time. He hasn't been obsessing since September like you have. It's not his fault you were hopeless from the beginning. He's Jared. It'll be fine."
"I hate you."
"Fine, you're not in love with him. You don't miss him. You're just in love with his massive cock and you're pacing around and waiting for his brother to leave because you want to put it in your mouth."
"Yes. Exactly."
"You are so the more fucked up one. I only hang out with you because you make me look normal."
"I have to or no one would talk to you." Jensen ignored Lexi's laughter as he snatched his ringing phone from the table. He made himself wait for the first few notes to play before flipping it open.
"I just got back and Jeff finally went home. Are you at the dorm or the townhouse?" Jared asked.
"Dorm. You want me to come to over? Lexi's sleeping in here because she says her room is too big to sleep in alone until Allie gets back. Don't ask. I think she just likes my mattress better."
"Yeah, or you know, if y'all are hanging out, we can do something later," Jared said.
"No. She's cool. I'll come over."
"Oh yeah. You don't miss him at all." Lexi's giggles followed him out the door. She could laugh all she wanted. She probably wasn't getting laid tonight and he was.
Jared pulled the door open before Jensen even reached for the knob.
"Hey." Jared grinned, hooking his fingers in Jensen's belt loops and pulling him in the room. Jensen leaned into him, sighing as he let his lips slip open to let Jared in. Jared kept the kiss slow and soft, then pulled back to press light kisses down Jensen's neck. He chuckled, making Jensen shiver at the hot puff of air against his neck, before nuzzling his face into Jensen's neck. "Missed seeing you everyday."
"Yeah." Jensen pushed Jared back toward the bed, pushing Jared's t-shirt up and off as they stumbled over Jared's duffle. Jared's lips were hot against Jensen's, and his hands felt fucking huge on Jensen's back as they slid under Jensen's shirt.
Jared sat on the bed, pulling Jensen onto his lap and throwing Jensen's shirt aside.
"Should we put something on the door?" Jensen gasped as Jared lay back on the bed, pulling Jensen on top of him.
"Locked is enough. Chad's not back until next Monday."
"Good." Jensen grinned before letting his lips trail down Jared's neck. Next time they did this, Jensen was going to tease until Jared was begging for Jensen to just wrap his lips around Jared's dick and suck. Today? Jensen just wanted to prove he had more skill than the drunken blowjob he'd given Jared on New Years. And if that meant coming with Jared's dick in his mouth, then that was just a bonus.
"Damn, Jensen," Jared moaned when Jensen started to mouth down his chest, but his hands fell heavy on Jensen's shoulders, pulling Jensen up instead of pushing Jensen down toward his cock the way he should be. "Hold on."
Jared couldn't be telling him to stop. They'd done this. He was new at this whole healthy relationship thing, but he was pretty sure that people didn't usually go backwards.
"Something's wrong?" Jensen looked up.
"I just-" Jared looked away, biting his lip, and Jensen scooted back up until he could lie on his side face to face with Jared.
"I pushed, on New Years, didn't I? Shit, Jared I'm sorry. I thought you were okay with it, but I was drunk and that's really not an excuse." Shit. Shit. His own friends were going to kill him for this one.
"Dude, relax. I'm not upset about New Years. New Years was awesome." Jared reached up to brush his hand over Jensen's cheek and smiled.
"Then I'm lost."
"New Years was awesome. I mean that. You were drunk and you obviously wanted it and I'm not complaining. It's just," Jared paused, looking down as a blush crept up his neck. "I still haven't wrapped my head around doing that and eventually you're going to get annoyed that you're doing it and I'm not."
"Are you sure? It's not because I pushed?"
"No, dude. I'm really not complaining about it. I'm not crazy."
"Okay, but what if I promise that I'm not going to get annoyed?" If Jared was fine with Jensen sucking him off, then he wasn't going to miss out for no reason.
"Dude, you don't know that."
"What if I do?"
"Okay." Jared paused, thinking a second. "Why are you so sure?"
"I didn't say that stuff because I was drunk, dude." Jensen groaned. "Well, okay, I said it out loud because I was drunk but that's not the point."
"What?" Usually Jared wasn't this slow.
"All that stuff, about just wanting to do it. It wasn't just because I was drunk. I like it. Kind of a lot." Jensen could feel his face getting hot as Jared watched him. He better fucking win this if he was going to have to talk about it. "Look, all sex is basically good, but everyone has their favorite things. We don't know what yours really are yet, and that's fine, but this is kind of mine."
"Your favorite thing is giving blowjobs?"
"You know, the proper response to your boyfriend telling you he kind of wants to suck your cock all the time is excitement and thinking you are the luckiest guy ever, not looking at him like he's a freak."
"Sorry, sorry." Jared's lips curled up in a small smile. "It's just not something I was expecting. I didn't think, I don't know, a lot of the girls I know just do it so the guy will do it and I know you're not a girl, but I didn't think you'd really want it like that. And it is awesome. Really awesome. Sorry. Make me stop talking now." Jared groaned and tucked his head under Jensen's chin to hide his face.
"Hum. You got a preference on how I make you stop rambling?" Jensen lifted Jared's face back up for a kiss. "Because I have some ideas."
"Yeah?"
"Uh huh." Jensen smirked. His mouth watered as he kissed down Jared's chest again. Jared's hands settled on his shoulders, blunt nails digging into his skin whenever he brushed against Jared's hard cock through his jeans. This time, he was going to show Jared how much better he was at this when he wasn't half drunk.
Jared lifted his hips when Jensen pulled down his jeans, looking down at Jensen to watch as Jensen licked up his cock. Jared was hot and salty on his tongue, and Jensen moaned as loud as Jared at the first taste. It was better than he remembered now that his mind wasn't fuzzy with alcohol. He followed the vein underneath back down, mouthing at Jared's balls until Jared's hand lifted toward his own cock. Jensen snatched it away, pressing Jared's hand to the bed.
"No helping." Jensen smirked, waiting until Jared gave him a shaky nod before dipping his head down again. Taking Jared into his mouth wasn't easy, but Jensen shifted against the bed, his cock aching for fiction as he swirled his tongue over the head of Jared's cock and tried to take him deeper.
"So good, Jen," Jared moaned, one hand tangling in Jensen's hair as Jensen took him deeper, flicking his tongue with each bob of his head. Jared's hips jerked pushing his cock deeper to bump against the back of back of Jensen's throat.
"Sorry, sorry," Jared gasped out when Jensen gagged, and Jensen rubbed a hand over his side to soothe him before settling on his hip to hold him to the bed. It was hot anyway and with each breath, Jensen took more, hollowing his cheeks out and sucking hard. He still had to use his hand, but Jared wasn't complaining. He was panting and shaking, struggling not to fuck into Jensen's mouth. Jensen hummed, relishing in the salty heat of Jared's cock until he gave up and unzipped his pants, wrapping a hand around his cock and moaning as he moved on Jared's cock. He jacked himself hard, whimpering around the hard cock in his mouth as he came.
"Jen, coming." Jared's words were clipped as Jensen's mouth filled with come and he struggled to swallow.
Jared pulled at his arms until he crawled back up Jared's body.
"Let me-" Jared kissed him hard as he reached down.
"It's okay." Cool, Jensen. Very cool.
"What? No way, dude." Jared reached for him only to find his cock going soft and already sticky with come. "Oh."
"Sorry." Jensen sighed and buried his head Jared's chest.
"So you were really serious about liking this." Jared chuckled, stroking his back.
"I should just never blow you again."
"But you want to. A lot."
"Remember how you're supposed to be grateful about having the best boyfriend ever?"
~*~
"I can't believe you're actually going on a real date without me. Promise me you'll let him sit next to you."
"It's not that big of a deal. He's gone to the movies with me before." Jared probably didn't even think it was a date. Maybe it wasn't. Jensen hadn't even been on a date since he was in high school trying to date girls.
"It's a date. He's your boyfriend and you're going to the movies with just him. That's the definition of a date."
"I hate you." If he didn't think about it as a date, then it wouldn't be any different than going to a movie with Chris and Mike when they wanted to see some action movie they couldn't talk any of the girls into seeing with them. Hell, Pete had dragged all of them to the movies once or twice and none of them had ever been the kind of assholes who would refuse to sit next to him. He wasn't even thinking about it being a fucking date until Lexi pointed it out.
"Relax. It's not like he's ever been on a date with a guy either. Hell, you never tell him anything, so he probably thinks you've been on a million dates with guys and he's sitting in class not paying attention and hoping he doesn't do anything stupid." Lexi got up and smoothed down his t-shirt. At least she'd showed up to remind him that they were leaving from Jared's class and he didn't need to dress up at all.
"What if he tries to kiss me at the movie or something?" Maybe it was a date, but it wasn't like a regular date.
"Then you let him?" Lexi rolled her eyes at his look. "He's not going to anyway. I think he figured out a long time ago that kissing you in public would freak you out. He's not going to try it. Just sit in the back and don't freak out if he tries to hold your hand. It's dark. No one will see you anyway."
Jensen groaned. He couldn't do this. He couldn't go out on a date with Jared like it was normal. This was why he didn't date or have boyfriends.
"Stop it. You're in love with him, and you spent four months pouting because you thought you couldn't have him. You can do this." Lexi pushed his keys in his hand and pushed him toward the door. "Go. First rule of your first real date ever: don't be late."
Jensen was a minute late, but Jared wasn't there waiting, so he figured it was safe. It wasn't like they set an exact time to meet considering Jared would be walking from his last class.
Five minutes later, Jensen was just about to pick up his cell phone and call when he saw Jared crossing the street with a girl he remembered seeing in the hallway a few times. She'd been coming out of Jared's room, but he'd assumed she was one of the many girls that Chad cycled through. Though he'd seen her three or four times and Chad's girls didn't usually come back after the first time. Jared stopped to finish talking to her, pausing and glancing around the union, but not in the direction Jensen was parked, before taking her notebook and writing something in it. Probably his number. Jared just gave his number to a girl. A girl who grinned, rose up on the tips of her toes and kissed him.
Jensen shifted his trunk into gear and pulled out, not paying attention to where he was going until he ended up at the townhouse. He debated trying to find somewhere else, but it wasn't like he could go back to the dorm where Jared would look for him.
It was just his luck that both Chris and Tom were on the couch when he entered. They both turned to look at him, and Chris got up, talking toward him.
"What's wrong? You're supposed to be on a date with Jared." Chris's voice was firm, but gentle. Fuck that. He'd rather have Chris screaming about it than giving him those worried eyes.
"How do you even know where I'm supposed to be?"
"Lexi told Tom." Chris shrugged.
"Can't any of you mind your own fucking business?"
"Whoa. It wasn't even like that. Tom called her to ask her to come over and she mentioned she wanted to stay at the dorm and hear how it went. That's all." Chris leaned against the back of the couch. "So, what happened?"
"When I went to pick him up, he was talking to a girl I've seen coming out of his room a few times. I thought she was fucking his roommate. Guess not." He might as well tell now. Even Chris would get that even if he hated Jared, he couldn't go kill one of Jensen's residents.
"I'm assuming he was doing more than talking if you're here. Did you talk to him or just leave?"
"He gave her his number, and she kissed him. I didn't really want to talk to him after that."
He could see Chris tense as he stood, but he just nodded to the couch.
"You want a beer?" Chris asked when he sat and Jensen nodded.
Tom followed Chris into the kitchen and he couldn't make out the mumbled voices, but when they came back, Tom walked past him and upstairs.
"You're not going to let me kill him, are you?"
"He's still my resident, and I don't need you to fight my battles. I'm not a fucking damsel in distress."
"I'm meeting every guy you date right away from now on. I don't care how much Mike and Alexis vouch for him."
Jensen nodded, taking a long swing of beer while Chris flipped open his ringing phone.
"Yeah. He's here. He caught that fucker trying to pick up a girl." Chris said. Jensen didn't try to fight for the phone. Everyone was going to fucking find out anyway. "Well maybe you don't know him as well as you thought. Jensen wouldn't just make this shit up."
Chris mouthed Alexis to him and he shook his head. This was just going to cause more trouble for her. He needed a plan before he talked to her.
"He doesn't want to talk to anyone. That's why his fucking phone is off. It's not even that simple. Jensen's seen her in his room before, and she fucking took his number and kissed him. Until you can start blaming the right person, you don't need to talk to him."
Hearing it out of Chris's mouth was almost as bad as seeing it. Jensen stumbled to the bathroom, closing the door before he let a few of the tears collecting in his eyes fall. He'd trusted Jared. He'd been so fucking sure that he'd fallen in love without even noticing. Now, Jared wasn't even different than Justin.
Jensen splashed water on his face before he opened the door. Chris held out his beer again when he settled on the couch, staring at the rodeo Chris was watching on the TV and wishing one of those damn bulls would just come through the screen and stomp all over him, too.
"Jensen! Fuck. You are so fucking retarded. I'm going to get you one of those collars so I can shock you every time you do something stupid." Lexi stomped in the townhouse and pulled the beer out of his hand. "You're going to listen to Jared's perfectly logical explanation, and then you're going to go back to Jared and beg him to forgive you."
"Wait a minute." Chris got up and stood between them.
"Jared didn't do anything, and I'm not going to let Jensen ruin the best thing that ever happened to him because he's overreacting." Lexi sat on the coffee table and lifted his chin so he had to look at her. "Jared is working with her on a project for class. That's why he was giving her his number. She was seeing Chad and that's the only reason you saw her coming out of their room. And the kiss? It was on the cheek. I don't know how you didn't tell Chris that, but it's not like he was even a participant."
"And you just believe his story?" Chris answered for him.
"Yes. But in case I was wrong, I caught Chad in the stairwell coming home and I squeezed his balls, literally, until he admitted that he actually liked this girl and that was why you saw her more than the other girls. But eventually she got sick of dealing with his stupid pledge tasks and ended it. Then I called that guy I hooked up with last week from Jared's class. He verified that they had a project. Jared's story checks out, and Jensen's story is a fucking load of crap and we all know that by now."
"Shit." Jensen knew he should be relieved, but now all he could think was that he couldn't go back to Jared after all this shit. Jared would want someone stable who didn't just freak out and stand him up.
"Come on. He'll forgive you after you talk to him and beg him." Lexi pulled on his hand until he groaned and stood up. "I'm driving. You can leave your truck here until you are sane enough to be trusted to drive again."
"Hold on." Chris's hand fell on his shoulder, stopping him. "You sure about this?"
"Yeah." Jensen nodded. Lexi's story made sense. Jared wasn't a cheater. He should have known better.
Chris nodded and let him go, but he didn't miss the look Chris gave him. Chris was letting him go, but he wasn't forgetting this.
"You need to tell him about Justin. You don't have to tell him everything, but you can at least tell him why you freaked out," Lexi said as soon as they were in the car.
"Lexi."
"No. He looked like he was going to cry. He hasn't done anything to make you think he'd cheat. You need to tell him. You should have told him more already. He doesn't even know about your parents."
"If I tell him about that," Jensen shook his head, not finishing the thought.
"Then he'll deal with it. He's not going to freak out and dump you because of your parents." Lexi sighed, shaking her head as she parked in the lot closest to the dorm. "Either way, you need to tell him about the cheating. You can wait on telling him about your parents, but you can't expect him to let you off on this without an explanation."
Jensen shook his head and she sighed. "Wait in your room. I'm not sure if Chad went home, but if he did, he's probably pissed at you. I'll get Jared."
Jensen nodded following Lexi back into the dorm and unlocking his room. Maybe if he looked sorry enough, Jared would just forgive him.
Jared didn't knock. He just stepped inside. Jensen could feel Jared's gaze on him even though he didn't look up. "Hey."
"Hey," Jared answered as he sat across from Jensen on the couch. Not on the bed. Shit.
"So how mad are you?"
"Scale of 1-10? Six and a half or seven. Could even be taken down as far as a four. Depends on what your reason is for thinking I was hooking up with some random girl." Six or seven wasn't bad. Jensen could deal with that.
"I just saw you talking to her and smiling and I thought you were flirting. Then I remembered seeing her coming out of your room a few times and I knew you'd never mentioned her. And then she just kissed you and what was I supposed to think?" It sounded so reasonable when he told Chris, but now it just sounded ridiculous.
"You thought I was flirting? Why? Because I'm normally so mean when I talk to people? Because Alexis and Allie don't kiss me on the cheek all the time? Dammit, I never mentioned her because I didn't even remember meeting her. Do you know how many girls Chad's hooked up with this year?" Jared's voice was sharper. Fuck. This wasn't working.
"I know. Okay? It was stupid." Jensen ran hand over his face and looked down. "I'm sorry. I was stupid and I should have just asked who she was."
"That's it? That's your whole reason why you just assumed I was cheating on you?" Jared leaned back on the couch and shook his head. Shit. Jensen could fucking hear his anger level going up.
"Jared. Please. I'm sorry, okay?" Maybe Lexi was right. He was going to have to explain. Lexi was always right.
"What have I ever done, Jensen? What have I ever done to make you think I'd do something like that? When have I done anything to make you think you can't trust me? To make you so sure that you didn't even ask me if there was a perfectly reasonable explanation." Jensen's wasn't sure what was worse: the anger, or the disappointed puppy eyes.
"Nothing! Nothing, okay! I know that. But I never knew before either. I didn't fucking see it coming before, so how the hell am I supposed to know now?" Jensen sighed and let his head fall in his hands. Fuck. He had to tell Jared. Jared was going to think he was an idiot for not having a fucking clue his boyfriend was with someone else.
"Before? Hey. What do you mean before?" Jared's hand rubbed over his knee. At least Jared was touching him again. When he looked up, Jared squeezed his knee and nodded for him to continue.
"Justin. When we were together."
"He cheated on you?"
"The whole time. The whole fucking six months. He had a girlfriend. First she was home for the summer and he just said he was visiting his parents every few weekends. Then she was in studying abroad in London in fall and there was nothing. No signs or anything. Lexi met me and found out in September last year and she hung out with us all the time and she didn't know either."
"But then his girlfriend came back?" Jared asked.
"Yeah. In November he started making excuses. Reasons we should break up. But, well, I found ways to take all these reasons away. So finally he just admitted it. He was just trying to let me down easy but since that wasn't working, he just admitted that Jacqui was coming home and that was it." Lexi was going to kill him for glossing over the shit with his parents, but fuck, he couldn't get all that shit out at once.
"Damn. Jen. I would never do that. That's just messed up. I'm sorry."
"I know. I do. It's just..." Jensen shrugged as he trailed off.
"You knew then too?" Jared got up, finally moving to sit on the bed with him and wrapping an arm around his waist. "Well, I guess it's a good thing everyone knows I'm a crappy liar."
"Yeah." Jensen leaned into him. "Are we okay?"
"We're okay. Just talk to me if something I do freaks you out. I'll tell you what's going on." Jared squeezed the arm around him and lay back on the bed, pulling Jensen with him.
"I'm not getting makeup sex, am I?" He had to ask, even if he really just wanted to sleep. This emotional shit was exhausting. Makeup sex was exhausting too, but at least it was worth it.
"No. You have to actually show up for a date to get laid." Jared sighed, pressing his lips to the top of Jensen's forehead. "But we can try again another day and maybe I'll let you blow me later."
~*~
To: Jensen
From: Pete
Subject: I can't think of a subject line that calls you stupid enough
Seriously, Jensen? Do I really need to come down there and make sure you don't do something like this again? If there's a next time, I'm getting his phone number from Mike and calling him to explain that you are mentally challenged.
Baby, Justin is not a model for most guys. There's not something fucked up about you that's going to make your boyfriend cheat on you. You gotta trust Jared unless he actually does something. And then, if he does, Chris will hurt him. Chris is good at that.
Love you. Next time you freak out and think about doing something stupid, call me first.
~*~
"I want to meet him," Steve said as he released Jensen from his hug.
"You couldn't even hold out on that until we left the airport?"
"Chris told me what happened last week. You're lucky he hasn't shown up at Jared's door already." Steve picked up his guitar and followed Jensen to his truck.
"I know, but I already told you that you could meet him. He's just in class right now."
"Yeah. Matt's having some people over Friday. You wanna bring him?"
"To Matt's party? Where I'm sure everyone is going to be high?"
"Jared doesn't know you've smoked?" Steve looked over at him from the passenger seat.
"It hasn't come up, but I know he doesn't smoke." He wasn't really sure Jared would care about him doing drugs, but he was pretty sure Jared wouldn't like being surrounded by it.
"Fair enough. Bring him to the show?"
"With Chris?" Jensen pulled into the driveway of the townhouse.
"He's gotta meet Chris eventually. At the show, we can both run interference."
"I'll think about it. You can always just come by the dorm. He'll wanna meet you anyway. He's been hinting about meeting more of my friends."
"And you're hoping that introducing me will get you out of introducing Chris?"
~*~
Jensen stood at Jared's door, wondering if he should knock again. Jared had been out of class for hours, but maybe he had plans Jensen didn't know about.
"Hey dude." Chad leaned against the doorframe when he opened the door. "Jared's not home."
"Oh, sorry." It wasn't that Jensen didn't like Chad. Chad knew how to not get caught with beer and Jensen didn't actually mind when Chad asked him to distract Jared and make sure Jared slept in his room so Chad could hook up. It could be worse. Chad could have said something a lot worse than finally when Jared told him that they were together.
"Amanda came in earlier. She said he probably wouldn't be home for a while because he's with your friend Chris."
"What?" Shit. How the fuck did that happen?
"Ask Amanda. That's all I've got." Chad shrugged.
"Thanks." Jensen turned to walk down the hall where Amanda answered on the first knock.
"Hey! Alexis says you're going to freak out, but you know I would have done something if Chris sounded like he planned to hurt him."
"What exactly happened? Where is he?" Jensen asked, looking around at all the girls. Lexi hopped off the bed she'd been sitting at with Allie and walked over to him.
"Sandy said Mike lured him out to Steve's van and I called him and tried to warn him before Mike took his phone away. I saw them push him into Steve's van from my window."
"Steve's van?"
"I already called Steve. He's not there. You know he's been parking it at Chris's and I guess Chris just stole it. Steve's already getting high at Matt's house."
"Did you talk to him?" Jensen turned to Amanda and she shook her head.
"Nope. I just talked to Chris. He said that Jared said I could borrow his calculator though, so I don't think Jared was really in danger. It just sounded like a joke."
"Shit." Jensen was going to kill him. Amanda didn't know Chris. She didn't know much he could fuck this up. Jensen pulled out his phone and hit the speed dial for Chris.
"Hey darlin. What's up?" Chris had the nerve to answer like he hadn't done anything wrong.
"I'm going to fucking kill you. Slowly. And I'm going to let Lexi help me. Just because she'll have better ideas than me." And if Jared broke up with him, he was never speaking to Chris again.
"Aww. Come on. He's fine. Not a mark on him." The bastard chuckled.
"Where are you?"
"Yeah, see, the thing is, I'm not really done with him yet."
"Yes, you fucking are. You realize I know every fucking place you could be." It wasn't like there was even a long list.
"Which is why we have not gone any of those places."
"Let me talk to him." Maybe Jared could at least tell him where they were so Jensen could save him.
"You're on speaker. He can hear you."
"What? Did you gag him? Because-"
"No! Chill out. Mike's just covering his mouth," Chris said, as if that was any better.
"Take me off speaker and let me talk to him."
"Um...no. Should have just brought him over to hang out so it wouldn't come to this."
"Mike and Tom are with you?" At least Mike wouldn't let them do anything too horrible to Jared. Plus, there was a whole bank of information about Chris that he hadn't shared.
"Yes. So really, you should be killing all of us."
"Bullshit. Mike only went because he actually knows Jared and he's probably making sure you don't do anything too awful to him. Tom only went because you and Mike told him to. So I'm thinking I'll kill you and just maim them. But since they're listening: Remember that first party we went to freshman year? And Chris picked up that girl. Her name was Christy and Mike was making all those jokes about how you were trying to fuck yourself."
"You asshole. I hate you. I try to do a nice thing like entertain your boyfriend while you're at class and you pull that shit out." Jensen was pretty sure he wasn't on speaker anymore.
"Give Jared the phone." Jensen waited a few seconds before he asked, "Jared?"
"Yeah. I'm here." At least Jared sounded like he was still okay.
"I'm so fucking sorry. I should have known he'd do something so stupid. Are you okay? Do you know where you are? I'll come get you." And after he talked Jared out of dumping him, he'd kill Chris.
"It's okay. Dude, I'm fine, I promise. I don't know where I am. But I'm fine," Jared answered.
"Yeah, and I'm sure Chris isn't being an ass at all. Fuck. I'm so sorry." He knew Chris. If he hadn't done something awful yet, he was going to.
"Jen. I'm fine. I swear. Relax, okay? It's no big deal. I'll see you tonight."
"See, he says he's fine," Chris said when he came back on the line.
"If you hurt him, if you do anything that makes him leave, I swear I will fucking end you. He better be in perfect condition when I see him again. One mark and I swear."
"Not a mark. Except the one on his neck I'm guessing you made. Speaking of which, this new kink is really weird. I thought Alexis was making that shit up. So chill out. Just show up at the party and we'll meet you there." Chris was laughing when he ended the call.
Jensen stared at his phone. Tom had left him a message begging Jensen to come to the stupid party he'd made up, but he hadn't planned on showing up or bringing Jared. Jared had only seen him drunk at New Years and he wasn't sure Jared was ready for even a half-assed townhouse party.
"It'll be fine. Jared's tougher than you think. He's not going to let Chris scare him away." Lexi ran a hand down his arm.
"Did he sound upset?" Sandy asked, moving to his other side.
"No. He said he's fine, but he hasn't even been with them too long. Chris is gonna keep him for at least another half hour. He's not gonna be okay."
"Chris doesn't want him to break up with you. You know that," Lexi said. "He's just worried. He just wants to check him out. Did he say when he's bringing Jared back?"
"He said to meet him at the townhouse for the party."
"Okay. Then we'll go there and wait."
Jensen nodded and let Lexi lead him out of the room.
"What if he changes his mind?"
"About you? He's not going to. You're over reacting. Again." Lexi sighed and took his hand. "Come on. Let's just go to the townhouse. We'll wait for Jared and it'll be fine."
Lexi chattered on the ride to the townhouse, reminding him again and again why Jared wasn't going to leave him.
"Seriously, Jensen. You're going insane over nothing. You're being more of a drama queen than Pete. He's going to think your friends are crazy, which he really already knew. And then he's going to get over it," Lexi said as they got out of the car and sat on the townhouse steps to wait.
Jensen nodded, occupying himself by pulling weeds out of the cracks in concrete.
"I'm going to laugh at you when Jared says you're overreacting. He's going to snuggle you all night in front of Chris after he figures out how much you worried." Lexi was so fucking evil, but he didn't care because Steve's van was pulling up to the driveway. Jensen got up, meeting Jared as he stepped out of the van first.
"Why don't I ever go through with it when I say I'm going to kill all my friends? I really mean it this time." Jensen tangled his fingers in the hair at the back of Jared's neck. He didn't look like Chris had done anything to him.
"Well, that would be kind of pointless. Because if I have to go through all this again with your new friends, you'll still be worth it, but I'm going to start expecting presents each time I survive." Jared grinned and leaned down to kiss him, leaving a hand on Jensen's cheek as he pulled back. Jensen resisted the urge to press closer against him and suggest they just ditch this stupid thing and go home. "I'm fine. Really."
"See, he's fine. Returned completely unscathed." Chris was still dead. He didn't fucking care if Jared turned out okay.
"And somehow? I think I'm going to kill you anyway." Jensen moved around Jared and stepped into Chris's space. He could hear Lexi taking Jared away behind him, but he didn't look away from Chris. He just stared until Jared was out of earshot before continuing. "I can't believe you fucking did this. What if he freaked out? What if he didn't think I was worth this shit?"
"Then it's better you find out now."
"That's not fucking good enough right now." Jensen shook off the hand Chris put on his shoulder.
"Man, come on. If he'd panicked, I'd have let him go. You know that. He took the damn handcuffs off himself. He wasn't even really trapped. You know I wouldn't just keep him like that if he wasn't okay."
"You could've really fucked this up for me."
"You could've brought him over a long time ago. You fucking should have and you know it." Chris crossed his arms and leaned against the van.
"So, what's your stupid verdict?"
"He seems okay." Chris shrugged.
"You're not forgiven."
"Yeah, whatever. What'd you want?"
~*~
To: Pete
From: Jensen
Subject: Karma's a bitch
Chris is a fucking asshole. He kidnapped Jared, threw him in Steve's van, handcuffed him, and interrogated him.
And then he got drunk and hooked up with Lexi. :D
~*~
"You want me to meet more of your friends?" Jared asked, but he was smiling.
"I was always going to let Steve meet you. I was hoping to have him be the only one who actually met you. He's just been out of town. He's only in town for a couple of weeks as it is." Jensen shrugged. "You don't have to go, but he's cooking. Lexi and Mike are going just so they can eat."
"Dude, if you want me to go, I want to go. I want to meet your friends. Even if they are insane." Jared smiled, lighting up the whole fucking room just like that. Then he was holding Jensen's head in his hands and kissing him. Fuck. How was he supposed to make sure they left on time with Jared kissing him like that? Jensen gave up, laying his hands on Jared's hips and tugging him closer.
"If I wasn't so hungry, I'd just let you guys go on not noticing I was here."
Jensen tried to ignore Lexi, but Jared pulled away, blushing and stepping back.
"I hate you." Jensen glared at her when Jared was out of his reach.
"Whatever. You left the door open. You're lucky I'm not Amanda." She did have a point. "Ready to go?"
"Yeah. Are you gonna let me have my keys back so I can bring my truck back today? Because I might actually want to use it sometime." So maybe he'd run away from Jared once. It wasn't like trapping him on campus meant he couldn't do it again.
"Steve came by and took them. He says he gets to make the call when you get them back."
"When did you even see Steve?" Steve was supposed to be the nice one.
"I couldn't find my bra. He braved Chris's room and found it for me in exchange for power over your keys."
"You traded my keys for your bra?" Jensen turned back to Jared. "Are you sure you want to know my friends? I think yours are nicer."
"I do, but yeah, I'm going to still keep my own friends. I'm not stupid enough to trade them or anything." Jared reached over and grabbed his hand, pulling him toward the door while reassuring Alexis that she was different and of course he considered her a friend. At least he thought that was what they were talking about. It was a little distracting with Jared holding his hand. He didn't hold hands with guys. Pete tried to do it once and the whole fucking time he felt like people were staring at them. There had to be a way to get out of this without Jared getting hurt.
"Good. Because if you say I'm not your friend I'm going to stop yelling at Jensen whenever he's stupid. I'd like to say it won't happen again, but it's not likely," Lexi said as she pulled open the door.
"Hey!" Jensen broke Jared's hold on his hand to reach out and tickle her. Lexi gave him a look like she knew he did it just to let go of Jared's hand, but maybe Jared didn't know any better.
"Just for that, I'm making you cram into the back seat instead of letting you drive so both you and Jared can sit in the front." Lexi pushed him back toward Jared, but Jared didn't try to hold his hand again.
"Hey. Mike got here already. He's lucky Tom dragged him out of the kitchen before I killed him," Steve said, poking his head out of the kitchen door as they walked in. "Come on and start getting plates before he gets back."
Steve held out his hand as Jared walked by. "Hey. It's good to finally meet you. I'm Steve."
"Oh shut up," Jensen interrupted before Jared could answer. "You were all the way across the country. If you'd been here, you would have met him."
"Go get something to eat. I'm amazed you haven't died from the shit you eat out of the microwave." Steve pushed him toward the counter, carrying his own plate past them into the living room.
"You know you can't actually take my keys back to California, right? I need them," Jensen said when he sat on the couch across from Steve. Jared chuckled beside him before digging into his dinner.
"I can always pass them on to Chris and Mike."
"That's just wrong." Mike really wasn't allowed to touch his truck. He couldn't even get a plate of food without spilling something.
Steve shrugged. "You'll just have to convince me in the next two weeks then."
"Ask him for my keys back?" Jensen asked, glancing at Jared as he ate. "He promised to be nice to you."
"I don't know. Considering that they got taken away so you couldn't drive away from me?" Jared grinned.
"You said I was forgiven for that." Jared had blown him and everything.
"You are, but if your friends want to help me, I don't think I should fight it."
"But you said I had to trust you and you'd trust me and all that. There's no trust that I won't leave if I can't leave. Me having my keys back is important for this trust thing." Jensen won at logic. Jared couldn't argue with that.
"Fair enough." Jared laughed and looked at Steve. "Can he have his keys back?"
"Nope."
"Sorry. I tried." Jared shrugged and went back to eating.
"I think I like him." Steve smirked. "I should tell him what you said when I asked why you liked him."
"Dude. I'm pretty sure you made some promise to not repeat that shit. I was sober and you promised." Steve was fucking dead if he repeated all that stupid shit about Jared making him be a better person.
"True. But I can tell him the real reason you moved him into the wrong room was because you thought he was so hot that you couldn't concentrate." Steve ducked when Jensen threw a spoon at him, but kept laughing and talking to Jared. "He thought you were so hot that he couldn't read a little chart with room numbers and that was before he even knew you."
~*~
"Steve's lost his fucking voice," Chris said, not bothering to knock as he barged into Jensen's room.
"No. I know what you're going to ask, and the answer's no." If he wanted to be a singer, Jensen would have told Chris when he brought it up freshman year.
"It's one show. I haven't asked you for a fucking year. We've already sold all the tickets the club gave us."
"And you can sing by yourself-just like you have all the other times I said no. It's not that big of a deal." Jensen turned back to his computer screen and tried to read over the paper he'd been writing.
"So? I don't want to." Chris kicked the leg Jensen's chair. "Why don't you wanna sing?"
"Because I haven't practiced, I don't know any of the new songs, and I have a fucking paper to write."
"You were playing along just fine a few days ago, I haven't even made the set-list yet, and your paper isn't due until next week." Chris leaned over and pushed the button to shut off his monitor. "Come on. Invite Jared. He'll be excited."
"Chris." Jared didn't even know he could sing.
"What? You think he's going to go crazy and pick a fight like that asshole? That boy tries to pick a fight with me and he's gonna get a hell of reality check."
"Chris, you can't just fucking beat him up." It was a fucking miracle Chris wasn't in jail already.
"Well, why should I have to? Did he do something to make you think he'll go crazy or is this just you being paranoid again?"
"I don't wanna do it. Sing by yourself and if I think you're going to try to call me up there, I'm not even fucking going."
"You can't just live in a fucking box so you'll never do anything he doesn't like."
~*~
"Hey." Jared was sitting outside his door when Jensen came back from his last class.
"Chad kicked you out again?"
"No." Jared got up and followed him inside the room. "How come you told me you had something to do with Chris and didn't tell me it was a show?"
Shit. Because if he brought Jared, he knew Chris would get the crowd to cheer him onstage.
"What are the chances you'll believe I just couldn't get an extra ticket?" He was going to kill whoever told Jared.
"Zero, but I'll give you points for not really trying to lie." Jared sighed and let his hand rest on Jensen's hip. There wasn't even any room for him to get away from Jared. He was already backed up against the wall, literally. "You also didn't tell me Chris wanted you to sing."
"Who told on me?"
"Chris. I think he stole my number out of your phone when you were drunk." Jared smiled, letting his thumb slip under Jensen's shirt. "He wanted me to get you to sing with him, and I gotta admit I kind of want to hear it."
"Asshole." Jensen tried to think of a way out of this shit, but it was little hard when Jared's thumb was rubbing over the bare skin on his stomach. "I'd say I can't believe Chris stole your phone number and talked you into this, but I really can. He can play by himself. He's done it before. He just doesn't want to."
"Come on. I promise I hate that it worked as much as you do. But I still wanna hear you sing." Jared crowded him against the wall, letting his hand drift up and down Jensen's side.
"I just think it's a bad idea." Jensen let his head drop onto Jared's shoulder. It wasn't fair that he was trying to think up logical reasons against this with Jared all pressed up against him.
"Hey. What's wrong? Why's it a bad idea?"
"It just didn't go so well last time I did it." Jensen mumbled. "I took Justin and it turned into this huge fight."
"Why? Because I'm not Justin and I'm starting to wonder if I need to start wearing a nametag here." Jared's fingers threaded through his hair and rubbed the tension out of the back of his neck.
"Sorry. I know that. I do. It's just the girls. You know, they call out and stuff. He got jealous. Said I was flirting." It was probably better if he didn't mention that Justin also started an argument with Chris over it that nearly deteriorated into a bar fight.
"What? Dude, I wouldn't do that. Come on, why would I do that?"
"You got mad about the pictures from Mike's party." Not that Jensen really minded that Jared demanded them back from Lexi.
"I didn't get that mad. Besides, you were totally naked. Is this some kind of crazy naked concert?"
Jensen chuckled, lifting his head to lean his head back against the wall. "No. That would be creepier than seeing Chris and Lexi cuddling."
"Okay. So then we can all go and all the girls can talk about how hot you are, which honestly? I've heard all the damn time since the day I met you anyway and it just gives me the opportunity to mock them because I get to touch you and they don't. And then, we can come home and I can show you how hot I think you are." Jared took Jensen's head in his hands again and pressed their lips together, letting his tongue slide against Jensen's lips and pressing Jensen against the wall from chest to hips.
~*~
"You stole Jared's phone number, used him to get what you wanted, and now you think I'm gonna help you get a date with one of his friends." They were supposed to be doing a last minute rehearsal for the show. Instead, Chris was trying to find out if Jared was bringing Sandy.
"I know Jared told you who he was bringing." Chris scratched out one of the songs on the set list he was making.
"You've never even met Sandy. You're going off Mike saying that she's hot. You've met some of Mike's girls." Jensen respected Mike's insistence on the value of inner beauty. He just figured if someone who looked like Jared could have inner beauty, he'd go for the guy who looked like Jared.
"So you're saying she's not hot? Don't give me that shit about not knowing because you're gay. I know you can tell if a girl's hot. All the girls you pretended to go after were hot."
"Fine, she's hot." Hell, when Jared had started hanging out with her, he'd figured Sandy would be the one to get him.
"So? You're not gonna let me have a shot? She's Jared's friend. You're gonna have to get some other plan besides just making her disappear."
"Relax. She'll be at the show." Not that he couldn't keep her from dating Chris if he wanted. "So will Amanda and Allie. You have to figure out which one of them is Sandy."
"And you're not going to just tell me what she looks like." Chris pushed the set-list at him. At least Chris put in stuff he was used to singing.
"It's the girls' plan. If I screw it up, they'll just get pissed off and you'll have no date."
"And you're not gonna fuck it up for me if I do get her?" Chris asked.
"Not if you don't fuck it up yourself." Sandy'd be good for him. Jensen might even help.
~*~
Jensen groaned when his phone woke him up. He didn't want to talk to Chris. He wanted to lie on top of Jared and sleep. He hit the button to ignore the call and relaxed against Jared again. But when Jared's phone started playing Kane, he gave up and reached for Jared's jeans. If Chris was going to this much trouble to rehash his date, Jensen was going to point out that he was a girl before he hung up.
"Shit. I should answer it. I'll hang up if he's not dying," Jensen said before flipping it open. "If you aren't dying, I'm hanging this up and passing out."
"Mackenzie's here. She wants to see you," Chris answered.
Jensen sat up. He'd never even let himself think about getting to see her again. "What? She's at the townhouse?"
"Yeah. I can keep her here and make sure she makes it home alright if you want me to."
"No. I want to see her. I just," Jensen glanced at Jared, who had woken up all the way and sat up next him. Jared might freak out, but he couldn't turn Mackenzie away. "I haven't told Jared about all that shit and well, he's right here so I'm kind of going to have to now. Just give me about twenty minutes and bring her over, okay?"
"Yeah, sure."
Jensen switched off the phone. He couldn't talk about this and look at Jared. If Jared made the connection that his own family might not be any better, Jensen wasn't sure he wanted see it on Jared's face. Plus, there was the lying he'd done to avoid telling Jared sooner.
"So I lied about Christmas. I didn't just stay to make money."
"Yeah, I kinda figured that out." Jared scooted closer and bumped his shoulder.
"And you just didn't say anything?" Jensen braved a glance at Jared and he didn't look mad.
"Figured I'd give it some time. We'd kinda just started this thing and it didn't seem right to make you tell me what was up if you didn't want to." Jared's hand brushed his leg as he talked.
"I told you last year, Justin started making excuses why we should break up? And I just kept trying get around them?" Jensen started. It was easier when people just knew all this shit and he didn't have to tell them.
"Yeah." Jared whispered, closing his hand over Jensen's.
"Well, his last one was that he couldn't be with someone that wasn't out. So I told Chris, or well, Chris got fed up with me lying to him and not telling him what was going on and just told me he'd figured it out a long time ago anyway. And then you know, I thought that would be enough, but it wasn't. He said I wasn't committed if I was still lying to my family. So I did it. I told them last Thanksgiving." His hand was sweating, but Jared didn't let go.
"And?"
"It went just about how I thought it would. My parents said it was an abomination. If that's how I was going to live, I wasn't their son." He hated that word. Abomination. It was like they'd known already and they were quoting out of some stupid anti-gay pamphlet they'd picked up
Jared didn't say anything. He just squeezed the hand over Jensen's.
"It's okay. You don't have to say anything. It could have been worse. It turns out I got my friends in exchange. Chris paid my rent until I got a job. Mike got me this job so I could finish school. I haven't seen any of them in over a year and I've gotten used to it you know?" It could've been worse. He could've been on his own, and now he didn't just have his friends, he had Jared wrapped around him.
"And now?" Jared asked, tightening the hand that rested on his waist.
"My sister's here. Or she's at the townhouse. I guess she thought I might still live there. Chris says she wants to see me."
"Could be good though, right?"
"Yeah, I mean, she was in high school last year. She didn't really have much say in the whole thing. Or I don't know, maybe she wants to try and change my mind. Talk me into going to gay rehab or something." Jensen shrugged, glancing at his watch and getting up. They should really get dressed before Mackenzie showed up.
"Gay rehab? They have gay rehab?" Jared asked as Jensen slipped on his jeans.
"Something like that. My parents found it online. You go to this place and they try to teach you to not be gay or something. They sent this e-mail right after I told them, said if I went over Christmas break, they'd take me back or something. I never answered." He already knew it wouldn't work. He didn't know how his parents thought he'd never looked into it when he first started figuring things out.
"You want me to go?"
"To gay rehab? No, really, that would kind of suck, or actually not suck, because I'm pretty sure they'll tell you to stop doing that." Jensen tried not to think about what would happen if Jared decided he didn't want to risk his own family for this.
"Um, no. Because I know Sandy's plan for Chris and it still doesn't make any logical sense. I'm pretty sure girls are evil and enjoy it. Clearly the gay rehab people haven't thought this through." Jared wrapped long arms around him and pressed a short kiss to his lips. "You know what I meant. I can go if you think it will be easier."
"Do you wanna go?" This could get awkward and messy if Mackenzie wanted him to change his mind-especially if she wanted him to leave Jared.
"I'd really rather be here for you. But I'll get it if you want me to," Jared said, rubbing his hands up and down Jensen's back. It was stupid and it could really fuck things up, but now he wanted Jared to stay.
"Good. Because I kind of want you to hang around."
Jared smiled, kissing Jensen again before he finished finding all his clothes. Now he just had to hope this didn't make Jared change his mind.
"Were you always this annoying? Because I really don't remember you being this annoying. Or no. I do. But it was a different kind of annoying. Actually I think this is less annoying than the last time I saw you. It's really amazing that you've gone this entire time without speaking to me like I'm retarded. Which is why it's so hilarious that you're trying to date someone barely older than me. I should point out to her that you're ancient and two years ago you'd have talked to her like she was mentally challenged. Oh, and I should find all those old pictures of you and Jensen from freshman year. I bet she'd love those." Mackenzie's voice carried down the hall. Somehow, he'd expected her to sound different.
"You think maybe you could think less about me and more about your brother," Chris hissed.
"Oh my gosh. She lives here, doesn't she? How else would you meet a freshman? I'm so going to figure out who she is tomorrow and tell her you're like totally in love with her already-if she doesn't already know with it being really obvious and all." Mackenzie giggled and Jensen couldn't help laughing as he went to open the door. Chris deserved this for making him dig so much information about Sandy out of Jared.
"Jensen!" Mackenzie shrieked and threw her arms around Jensen's neck, her hair smothering him when he leaned down to hold on. "I'm sorry. I would have called but I couldn't get your new number and Mom and Dad wouldn't even let me get online without watching to see if I was trying to e-mail you and now I guess you have a new e-mail address or something. And Josh is just being an ass and he wouldn't come with me but at least he's not telling on me for coming down here."
"You got here by yourself? Without a car or damn, do you have a car now?" Jensen pulled back to get a better look at her. She was taller by a few inches and her hair was longer. She'd gotten highlights so now he'd really be able to call her blonde when she did something stupid.
"I finally saved enough money to move into the dorms a couple weeks ago. Anyway, my roommate's boyfriend goes to TUSA and it was only an extra hour and a half down here so she gave me a ride and I gave her gas money. Do you have food? Because I had to sit at the townhouse for like an hour and I'm hungry and I went through the kitchen but apparently Chris can't buy food like a normal person." Mackenzie turned her head just enough to glare at Chris.
"We can order pizza. You think maybe you can tell me what the hell's going on?" He'd heard nothing for a year and now she was just here, babbling in his arms like it was nothing.
"I told you, moron. Look, I'm not like Mom or Dad or Josh. I don't give a shit who you date. I'd've told you that sooner, but you know, I was in high school and they wouldn't let me talk to you. Then Mom and Dad decided I had to live at home for college. Which they swear is to save money since I'm at TUD anyway. But seriously? They're afraid I'll get all corrupted at college and turn into a sexual deviant like you or something." MacKenzie rolled her eyes at the idea and kept talking. "Anyway, it took a while for me to save the money to just move out on my own so I could come down here and find you without getting all disowned and shit. I mean, I would if I had to but I'd rather be able to keep trying to convince them to not be jerks anymore. Can we have pizza now?"
"Yeah, yeah. Pizza." Jensen nodded, and Jared put the phone in his hand so he could call.
"Hey. I haven't met you before. Oh my gosh. Are you the new boyfriend?" Mackenzie said, noticing Jared for the first time.
"Is he the new boyfriend?" Mackenzie asked, before he could even think about finding the number in his phone to call for pizza. "He's totally adorable. But seriously? He looks like he's my age. Oh my gosh! He is my age, isn't he?"
"He's older than you, okay." Jensen lied. Mackenzie was never going to let him live this down.
"How much? It's like a month or something isn't it? He's like a few months older than me, but he's still a freshman? Does this mean I'm allowed to date people your age now?"
"No." Jensen would have to kill the guy. Chris would help.
"That's not fair!" Mackenzie pouted like she thought he'd even care.
"Yeah, well, I'm your big brother; I don't have to be fair. You date someone my age and I'm driving up to Dallas and kicking his ass."
MacKenzie rolled her eyes and plopped down on the couch next to Jared. "See this? I went to all this trouble to come see him and he's so mean. Don't you think he should be nicer to me? He hasn't even introduced us. I'm Mackenzie and you are?"
"Jared. Though I have a little sister. So I kinda have to agree with him on this one," Jared said. Jensen knew there was a reason he loved Jared. He turned around so they couldn't see his smile and tried to concentrate on ordering pizza while Mackenzie offered Jared old pictures of him. So much for Jared not having any pictures of him on the toilet.
"The girl Chris likes? I have her e-mail address." Jared was saying as he hung up the phone.
"Okay, see, I think that's enough bonding." Chris moved from where he'd been leaning against the wall and faced Jared. "Isn't it past your bedtimes or something?"
"See! This is what I was talking about! He always talks to me like I'm twelve. Does he talk to this girl like that?" Mackenzie asked.
"Sandy is almost a year older than both of you. She just has an August birthday that makes her a freshman."
"Both of us?" MacKenzie turned back to Jared. Jensen was going to kill Chris. "Are you really older? When's your birthday?"
For once, Jensen didn't mind when Amanda poked her head in the room.
"Hey. Wow, it's a party in here and again with all the clothes. I'm beginning to think you guys aren't really hooking up. Though I guess that would be weird with Chris here. And some other random girl. Who're you?"
"I'm Mack. Jensen's sister."
"Well, I guess that really explains all the clothes. I'm Amanda." Amanda turned to him and smiled like she wanted something. "I need to borrow your boyfriend."
"Do I want to know why?" As long as she didn't plan on making Jared take off any clothes, he might be ready to work some things out with Mack without Jared right next him.
"Probably, but I'm not telling. Come on. I promise to return him in perfect condition." Amanda grinned and twirled her hair.
"Actually, your timing is perfect. Please. Take him before he plots with my sister any more." At least he could hope that Jared would just think all the stories were cute the way every girl he dated in high school did.
"Awesome!" Amanda came all the way in the room to drag Jared away, but Jared still paused as he passed Jensen and squeezed his hand before he let her pull him out of the room.
"Oh my gosh. He really is adorable. How on earth did you convince him to go out with you?" Mackenzie asked as soon as Jared was gone.
"I have no idea."
"Me either. I should have that," Mackenzie said as she popped off the couch. "We're so discussing him later. But where's the bathroom? I need to pee. Chris's bathroom is grosser than a public dorm bathroom. He needs to clean it before he lets Sandy come over or she's never going to go out with him again."
Mackenzie darted out the door, leaving him alone with Chris.
"Don't ask if I'm okay," Jensen said before Chris could speak. "I'm amazing. You should know that."
"I know." Chris nodded.
"But?"
"But she's gonna tell you about your family, and that's probably won't be as great."
"I'll get over it." Jensen shrugged. "And if you try to make me talk about it, I'm telling Sandy about every girl you ever had a one night stand with."
"I don't wanna have a heart to heart with your stupid ass about it," Chris said, but Jensen knew it couldn't be that easy.
"So why are we talking about it now?"
"Because when you do get upset about it, because you will, you're going to go talk to Jared instead of pretending you don't care." Chris crossed his arms like he had some say in the fucking matter.
"I think I can decide that shit for myself."
"No you can't. You're an idiot. So when I ask Jared, he's going to either say you talked about it and I'll drop it, or he's going to look clueless, I'm going to tell him to talk to you about it and then I'll add on where you hide your sex toy collection."
"Maybe he already knows about it."
"You just now got him to blow you." Chris laughed and shook his head, that bastard.
"Can we not talk about this when Mack might come back in."
"Yeah. I should get out of here anyway," Chris answered, already turning toward the door. "But I'm not joking. Talk to him. That's how these relationship things work."
Chris was out the door before he could answer, which was just as well because Mackenzie was back a second later.
"Chris left?" she asked, plopping back down on the couch.
"Yeah."
"I'm sorry Josh didn't come. I tried but he said one of us had to be the cover story. I know that you know that's not true, but I swear he doesn't hate you. I know he doesn't. He's just scared."
"Scared of what?" Being gay wasn't a disease you could catch.
"Mom and Dad, or that he won't be able to talk to you. Y'all were never that close and now he's not sure what to do. But he'll come around. I know he will." Mack grabbed his hand to pull him on the couch next to her.
"It doesn't matter." She didn't say anything about their parents and that said more than her insistence that Josh would change his mind.
"I'm not gonna give up working on any of them. I promise," Mack said, leaning her head on his shoulder. "And nothing they do is going to keep me away. I swear. You're my brother. I don't care if you're gay."
~*~
When Jensen came back to his room after his shower, he wasn't surprised to find his room empty. Mack never was much for doing what he asked her to do, especially if it was boring. All he had to do was walk down the hall and listen for her voice. She never could stay quiet for long. She'd probably keep him up half the night with her chatter.
Jensen wasn't sure he wanted to interrupt when he heard her voice coming from Lexi's room.
"...giraffes can be gay. They do this thing where they wrap their necks around each other and sometimes it's like foreplay but other times just for orgasms. And they're really flexible. So they can wrap their necks all the way around and still manage to reach to give head or have sex while doing the thing with the necks. I have this book and there's a picture."
"Please tell me you aren't using this book to try to convince Mom and Dad that it's normal. Because I'm not even sure you should have this book," Jensen said as he opened the door. Jared was sitting on the floor next to Allie's bed. Great. If she hadn't started the embarrassing stories already, she would soon.
"Of course not. They'd probably try to burn it or something and then I'd have to pay the library for it. I did show it to Josh just to piss him off and he took it away and returned it. Like I couldn't just check it out again." Mackenzie rolled her eyes and hopped off the bed. "Let me guess-you're tired because you're a million years old and so I'm supposed to go to sleep now, too?"
"Unless you want to sleep in the hall instead of in my bed, which I'm nice enough to give up for you," Jensen said as she got up to come to him.
"Fine, I can wait until tomorrow to tell lots of embarrassing stories about you. But I'm going to have to do it the entire day. I've got over a year to make up for," Mackenzie said, kissing him on the cheek before she left the room.
"I really wish I thought she was joking about that." Jensen sighed as he held out a hand to Jared to help him up. "I'm taking you back for a few minutes."
Jared nodded, threading his fingers through Jensen's as he said goodnight to the girls.
"Everything okay?" Jared asked after they got back to Jared's room. Chad wasn't home yet, at least. Jared wrapped his arms around Jensen's waist and pulled him until Jensen's forehead rested against his.
Now was when he was supposed to talk. Even Jensen could figure that out-even if he was only doing it because Chris always followed through with his threats.
"Yeah. Having her back? It's like I didn't even know how much I'd missed her. It's just weird hearing about my family like I'm not really in it anymore."
Jared's arms squeezed around him as he pressed his lips to the top of Jensen's head. Jensen took that as a sign to keep talking.
"My brother, he's got this girlfriend and he's thinking about asking her to marry him. And I should be happy for him. But I've never even met her and he's planning to ask his best friend to be his best man. I don't know. Maybe it was easier when I didn't know anything."
"Well, maybe she can get him to come around?" Jared was just as optimistic as Mackenzie, but Jensen knew better.
"Even if she does, it's not like I could be there without pissing a lot of people off." Jensen shrugged, taking a deep breath as he stepped back. "I should go. Before she sneaks off again and starts showing people the pictures of the monkeys having gay sex or the giraffes giving each other head."
~*~
To: Jensen
From: Pete
Subject: I heard about Mackenzie!
So I know you've just been too busy with her to tell me yourself, and that's fine. Spend all the time you can while you have it. See, baby? Good things are happening now.
~*~
I can't believe you're canceling. The test isn't for four more days. Steve's leaving in two days." Chris stopped on the sidewalk and leaned against the side of the building where Jensen had his next class. It was like Chris knew Justin had called the day before. Hell, Chris probably did know and that was why he'd walked with Jensen all the way to his class. It wasn't like Jensen had answered.
"The test is Friday. I need all three days."
"And you promised Jared some time?" Chris smirked.
"Shut up. Because of your stupid show, I still have a movie to make up for."
"Yeah, because it's my fault you stood up your boyfriend and just now got around to making up for it." Chris shook his head.
"Whatever. Take Sandy. It's about time you actually asked her out again instead of just pretending you like to hang out in my dorm room all the time. She knows you're just hanging around so you can see her more. Amanda's already commented about how you weren't around so much last semester."
"Maybe I wanted your opinion on this guy. If we're going to work with him, it'd be nice to know if he's gonna piss me off, and you read people better than I do."
"Sorry. It's not like you won't make him come play with you before you decide. I'll meet him then. Take Sandy tonight. Steve probably wants to meet her anyway. I'm surprised he hasn't said anything with the way he insisted on meeting Jared."
~*~
Chris needed to learn how to text. If he'd just learn how to fucking text, then he could text Jensen what they thought of this guy they were thinking of using on the next album instead of calling. Calling killed a hell of a lot more of his study time.
"I'm going to fucking kill Steve," Chris said before Jensen could remind him that he didn't have time for this shit.
"Why?"
Jensen set the phone on the desk. He didn't even need to put on the speaker phone to hear Chris.
"He was a fucking asshole all night. He wouldn't even fucking talk to her and when he did, he was a fucking asshole."
"Steve? Steve was being an ass?" The closest he'd seen to Steve being an ass was when Steve stood at the door of the townhouse and told Justin that he might as well go home because if Jensen didn't want to see him, he didn't have a chance in hell of getting past Chris and Tom.
"I know it's hard to believe, but he spent the whole fucking night acting like Sandy walked in and insulted his mama. I'm lucky she didn't tell me not to call her again. He's fucking lucky she didn't tell me not to call her again."
"You want me to talk to him?"
"If you want me to talk to him again without punching him in the face. Hell, I might just kick his ass if he tries to come get his stuff." There was a bang as Chris slammed a door.
"You told him not to come to come back to the townhouse?" That was extreme even for Chris.
"I told him to give me some time to cool off. I'm not the fucking asshole right now."
"Where is he?" So much for studying. It was a good thing Jensen's first class wasn't until noon.
"I don't fucking know."
"Chris."
"Probably still at the bar. He has enough money for a cab when he wants to leave." Chris sighed, and Jensen had to pick the phone back up to hear what he said next. "Something's up with him. He bitched at you last week and now I really wish I fucking remembered what you were talking about when he did it."
"I'll see what I can get." Jensen got up as he hung up the phone.
The chatter in Jared's room went silent as soon as Jensen knocked on the door. There was a pause before the door opened to reveal Chad.
"I think this is enemy territory for you right now, dude."
"Figured it might be." Jensen nodded, not bothering to try and look past him.
"Are we mad at Jensen?" Amanda asked from inside the room.
"No," Sandy answered just before Jared showed up next to Chad.
"I need a lot more of a reason to be mad at Jensen."
"Yeah?" Jensen offered him a smile.
"Considering we're not even mad at Chris? Yeah."
"Can I borrow you to help me with something, or are you already claimed? I can ask Mike." It probably made more sense to ask Mike, but if he wasn't studying, he'd rather get a few extra minutes with Jared.
"Go ahead. Chad doesn't care if we stay without you to eat all your ice cream," Sandy called.
"As long as you all keep looking that hot while you're doing it." Chad shrugged and walked back to his bed, leaving the door open.
"Can I borrow your car?" Jensen asked Lexi. "Since you gave my keys away, I should just take it."
Lexi rolled her eyes, but she nodded without asking questions.
"So what're we doing?" Jared asked as they walked toward the stairs.
"I need someone to drive Lexi's car home so I can drive Steve's. I get it if you're pissed at him. Chris is really fucking pissed off, too."
"I can still help you. You're picking him up at the bar?"
"Yeah. Pretty sure he's still there. He's staying with Chris and he knows to stay clear for a while." Jensen resisted defending him even though Jared hadn't even said anything bad about Steve yet.
"You think he's okay?" Jared asked as they adjusted the seats in Lexi's tiny car.
"You're asking if he's okay?"
"He's your friend." Jared shrugged, reaching across the car to rest his hand on the back of Jensen's neck. "I'm hoping he's got a reason. He seemed like a nice guy."
"He is a nice guy."
"Okay." Jared's fingers massaged the back of his neck as he talked. "So you'll figure out what's wrong, and it'll be okay."
"Thanks." Jensen parked next to Steve's car. The lot was deserted and Lexi's car windows were tinted, so he gave in and leaned across the console to kiss Jared.
"You want me to wait?" Jared asked when he pulled back.
Jensen shook his head. "I'll take Steve's car home or trade his keys for mine."
Jared nodded and kissed him again. "Good luck."
Jensen left the keys in the car for Jared and walked to the door of the club. The last band had already stopped playing and bouncer just glanced at his ID. "Driving someone?"
Jensen nodded and the guy just waved him in. The bar was closing soon anyway. He found Steve at the bar with a glass of whiskey. From the way Steve was leaning, it wasn't his first glass.
"I'm on your couch?"
"If you want it, but Chris'll let you come home. You know that." Steve should know Chris always let any of them come home. Hell, Jensen had done a hell of a lot worse than this.
"I fucked up." Steve swallowed the last of his whisky and let his head fall on his arms. The bartender glanced at Jensen and nodded to Steve's empty glass. When Jensen shook his head, the bartender took it and headed off to the other side of the bar.
"Yeah. You did." Jensen sighed. "You got a reason?"
"My own stuff."
"I think Chris might be more forgiving if you give me more than that."
"It just," Steve turned his head so he could look at Jensen. "it doesn't help that he's pairing off, too."
"You're mad we're pairing off? Because you seemed fine with Jared." Hell, Steve had liked Jared just fine.
"You deserved it."
"And Chris doesn't?"
Steve groaned. "No. Just, it was easier not having what I wanted before he did. You, you're more annoying without Jared."
"Thanks a lot." Jensen shoved at his shoulder. "So you want a girl you can't get, and you weren't thrilled to be the third wheel."
Steve shrugged, not agreeing but not arguing either.
"You gonna tell me who she is?"
"Doesn't matter."
"Keys?"
Steve dug his keys out of his jeans and set them on the bar for Jensen.
"You left the keys to my truck on here. I'm taking it home after I drop you off." Somehow getting it back didn't seem worth this shit.
"You're looking like the smarter one right now anyway."
~*~
"How's Steve?" Jared didn't ask how he got in the room even though it was locked. Of course, stealing Jared's key out of the office wasn't legal, but he'd only get in trouble if Jared or Chad told on him, and Chad complained less when he didn't get woken up by Jensen calling or knocking.
"Not so good." Jensen sat on the edge of Jared's bed, and Jared nuzzled against his thigh.
"Hum," Jared closed his eyes as Jensen's fingers combed through his hair. Jensen thought he was slipping back asleep until he spoke. "You figured out what was wrong?"
"Sort of."
"It's okay if you're not supposed to tell me."
"It's okay." Chris was going to tell Sandy anyway. "Steve's got some girl he's in love with, and I guess she's not interested. He wasn't prepared to play third wheel on Chris's date."
"That's a reason to take it out on Sandy?"
"I don't know. It's all he'd give me. He wouldn't even tell me who she was. I think she's probably why he took off in December though."
"You're worried," Jared mumbled, picking at a loose thread in his jeans.
"Steve's usually the easy one. He doesn't broadcast stuff, but you ask him and he'll tell you what you want like it's no big deal."
"And he didn't wanna tell you?"
"Nothing more than what he thought he had to." Not that he wanted to have some kind of heart to heart. That was Steve's deal.
"Come here." Jared pulled at the blanket Jensen was sitting on.
"We should go to my room." He'd only slept in Jared's room a couple times when Chad was out of town.
"Your sheets are still gross." Right. He was supposed do laundry tonight and he hadn't. "Sleep here. Chad doesn't care. You know how many times he's had a girl in his bed when I got home? He always makes sure they've put clothes back on at least."
Jensen nodded, standing up to strip off his jeans before lying down in front of Jared. Jared's arm wrapped around him, pulling him tight against Jared's chest.
"You'll figure it out." Jared pressed a kiss to the back of his neck before drifting back to sleep behind him.
~*~
To: Pete
From: Jensen
Subject: Steve
I know you've seen him in California a few times. Do you have any idea what the fuck is going on with him?
Chris introed him to Sandy last night and he was a total asshole to her! Chris was pissed off. (Though Sandy didn't blame him and still promised him another date.) And all Steve would tell me is that he's got a thing for some girl who isn't interested and he didn't want to be on their date. Then he wouldn't talk about it anymore.
~*~
To: Jensen
From: Pete
Subject: Re: Steve
I don't know. He's been a little depressed, but I made him have fun when he was here. He didn't say anything about a girl though. I'll try to get something out of him. It's not usually that hard with him.
Also, did he say a girl specifically? I still say it could be a guy.
~*~
To: Pete
From: Jensen
Subject: Re: Re: Steve
I don't remember exactly what he said, but give it up. I'm sure it's a girl.
~*~
To: Jensen
From: Pete
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Steve
You're all in denial. I still think Steve's bi.
But whatever. I went to LA and picked him up at the airport, but when I tried to ask, he wouldn't talk. It was really fucking weird. When I dropped it, he caved and said he'd stay with me for a week.
So now I really think it's about a guy.
~*~
Jensen loved Jared. He had to. If he didn't love Jared, he wouldn't put up with Jared waking him up all the time.
"Sleeping," Jensen complained. If he didn't open his eyes, he wasn't really awake.
"Dude, it's eight o'clock." Jared combed through his hair before cupping his cheek.
"Stayed up most of the night studying for organic. Think it went okay though." Sometimes he really missed being a freshman and breezing through his classes.
"Sorry. I just...Jeff knows," Jared whispered.
"You okay?" Jensen opened his eyes and tried to get a better look at Jared's face. He didn't look like he'd been crying.
"Yeah. He's a little freaked out but he's says it'll be okay. He just has to process the idea or whatever."
"That's a lot. He's trying." It was a hell of a lot better than most of the possibilities that Jensen had run through his head since Jared had brought up telling his brother about them. Jared still didn't look very happy though. Jensen pulled back the covers. He'd never been good at comforting people, but he hadn't hated it when Jared pulled him into bed after he came back from taking a drunk Steve back to the townhouse.
"Dude, it's way too early to be sleeping." Jared shook his head, but at least he smiled a little.
"You wanna talk about it then?" Jensen asked. Jared liked talking about things, right? He was always trying to get Jensen to do it more.
"Not really much to talk about." Jared shrugged. "He knows. He's processing. We didn't really get into it much."
Jensen nodded a little before pulling the covers around him again. He should stay awake, but he'd stayed up most of the night before because of his stupid test. He was trying to open his eyes again when he heard the buzz of Jared's zipper. Jensen pulled back the covers again, scooting back until his back was pressed against the wall to make room for Jared. He pulled Jared to him and kissed the back of his neck, holding Jared like Jared had held him.
~*~
Jared was lucky Jensen had the reflexes to hold onto him when he almost rolled off the bed. It had to be too early for anyone to be knocking. Unless it was Sandy. Later, Jensen was going to make fun of Chris for not even being able to keep her up late enough that she let Jensen sleep late.
"Probably just Sandy," Jensen said before calling out, "Come in!"
"Okay. There's got to be some kind of rule against this." The guy that walked in looked familiar, but Jensen was sure he'd remember meeting someone that big. Jared grunted, falling off the bed as the giant walked in.
"What?" Jensen sat up, rubbing the sleep out his eyes. "Who the hell are you?"
"Who the hell do you think you are? Aren't you supposed help and guide the freshman or something? Not sleep with them." The guy stepped further into the room as Jared fumbled with his jeans. Jensen wasn't sure how he got in the dorm and why he thought Jared was any of his fucking business. He'd never taken advantage of Jared. He'd been so fucking careful not to.
"I'm an RA, not a professor. I really don't have enough authority for it to matter. So no, there isn't a rule against it. Now, how about we get to who the hell you are. Because I'd fuckin' know if you lived here." Jensen stood up, trying to get in front of Jared. It might take both of them to take this guy out, but Jared pushed in between them before Jensen could form a plan.
"Jensen, please. Stop. It's my brother. It's Jeff." Jared pressed his palm against Jensen's chest. The puppy eyes were worse when there was fear in them. Jensen nodded, letting Jared turn around to face his brother.
"We were just sleeping," Jared said.
"You were just sleeping? He's wearing your pants." Jeff said. Fuck. This was really not how he was supposed to meet Jared's brother.
"We were still just sleeping. You didn't think to maybe call before showing up?" Jared asked.
"I remembered where I'd heard his name before. Megan spent a week talking about your 'hot senior RA' after you moved in. It's amazing how you left some of that out." Jeff was going to kick his ass. He'd worried so much about Jeff being upset with Jared for being with a man that he'd forgotten Jeff was going to kill him because he was way too old for Jared.
"Come on, it's not that big of a deal, dude." Jared was saying as Jensen found his t-shirt on the floor and slipped it on.
"Not that big of a deal? Jared, come on, how old is he?" Jeff leaned to the side to glare at him over Jared's shoulder.
"He's only twenty-two."
Jensen cringed as Jared said it. He was going to die. That much was obvious. If Jensen was in Jeff's position, he'd kick his ass, too.
"Only twenty-two? Jared, this started in December. You weren't even that far into eighteen. He's-"
"If you say he's taking advantage of me, I'm really going to kill you. I'm not Megan. I'm not a girl and I'm not stupid. You don't get to say that." Jared raised his voice, stepping toward his brother. Shit. If they started really fighting, he'd need at least two more guys to break that mess up. He'd never taken Jared for a fighter, but his brother could easily be a different story.
"Dammit, Jared. I didn't say that."
"You were going to. You're thinking it."
"Okay, maybe I am a little." Jeff admitted. "That's a big difference, Jared."
"So you were just going to show up and attack him without telling me you were here?"
"No. I just wanted to meet him. Check him out." Jeff stepped toward Jared again, but he wasn't yelling, so Jensen could hope it wouldn't come to blows. "I just didn't expect to find you in his bed."
"And you'd be freaking out just the same if you found me in bed with Alexis or Sandy?" Jared asked, and Jensen could hear the tremble in his voice. Shit. He'd rather Jeff just beat him up for being too old than have Jared sound like that.
"Maybe not." Jeff sighed. When he spoke again, the anger was replaced with something more like the tone Josh used on Mackenzie when she was upset. "But Jared, you gotta give me a break here. I'm trying, but this wasn't in the handbook. I know what to do if Megan tries to date some guy four years older than her and I know what to do if some girl breaks your heart. But this is new. I don't know where my middle ground is yet."
"I know, but I'm still me. I'm not just going to let someone take advantage of me."
"You're telling me that's not at all what happened with Alexis? You did really hook up with her, right?" So maybe Jeff had a good reason for worrying. He had no reason to believe Jensen wasn't going to hurt Jared and every reason to think Jared might let himself get hurt.
"That was more of a misunderstanding."
"I'd like to point out that if you hadn't decided to not tell me about her, either, I could have told you she was only looking for a hook up. The girl was playing me the second I walked in the door. Literally. There's a reason I worry about you when you don't talk to me."
"If I acknowledge that, can we never talk about the Alexis thing again?"
"Deal. Now how about you move over and actually introduce me to your boyfriend. And then you can fill me in on what's actually been goin' on over here," Jeff asked, tilting his head to look Jensen again.
"You have to be nice." Jared still didn't move from in front of him.
"I'll be nice, dammit." Jeff rolled his eyes and sighed when Jared didn't move. "I'll be nice. I want to get the whole story from you before I talk to him anyway."
Jared moved to the side so Jensen could stand next to him. Jeff held out a hand and when Jensen shook it, Jeff's grip rivaled any father of any of the girls he'd taken out in high school.
"We're still gonna have a talk. I'm just gonna talk to my brother first."
~*~
"Are you sure you don't want me to call backup?" Lexi asked, "He's kind of huge. I love you, but you probably need Mike, Chris, and Tom."
"If he wants to kill me, he'll just wait and find me alone some other time." Jensen figured he might get lucky and only get a warning punch once Jeff figured out Jared still had some of his virtue intact.
"And if you stay here, Jared will hear you and come save you?"
"That, too."
"I can stay if he comes back."
"Because that's really going to make me look good?"
"You really want me to leave you alone with him?" Lexi stared at him. "You saw him, right? He's bigger than Jared!"
"I want to get my ass kicked with dignity." It wasn't like he could actually get away with even fighting back. If he somehow managed to get Jeff down, Jared wouldn't be happy about it anyway.
"You're stupid."
"It's a guy thing."
"Guys are stupid." Lexi rolled her eyes.
They both jumped at the knock on the door. Lexi nodded toward the door and motioned that she could get it, but Jensen shook his head. If it was Jeff, he'd just as well face it himself.
"Jared knows you're here?" Jensen asked when he opened the door.
"Nope. Said I was going to the bathroom," Jeff answered. "You going to let me in or yell for him to save you?"
"You'd find me again anyway." Jensen stepped back to let Jeff in and motioned for Lexi to leave.
"If it sounds like he's dying, I'm calling the police." Lexi said as she walked past Jeff and closed the door.
"You have that little girl defend you?" Jeff asked.
"You wanna call her a little girl to her face like that?"
"No. Just because I don't fight girls." Jeff leaned against the closed door. "First, let's start with how you're too old for him, and if I ever think you're pushing him at all, I'll put you out of commission so you can't."
"I'm not going to give you a reason for that." Hell, Jeff had to know that they'd been together almost three months and if Jensen wasn't getting hit yet, then he also knew Jensen hadn't pushed yet.
"Good. Make sure you don't. So we'll move on to how if you hurt him, there will be so many pieces of you that it will take them days to identify the body. If they can even find the pieces. I'm good with a shovel and there's plenty of middle-of-nowhere land around here where no one would ever find you. Understood?"
"Understood."
"I'm only not kicking the shit out of you on principle because Jared would think it had something to do with you being a guy and he'd think I have a problem with him." Jeff waited for him to nod. When he did, Jeff smirked. "I also pointed out some things he should probably talk to you about. I'm not warning you what, but if I think you lied to him, I'll find out and take care of it."
"I wouldn't lie to him." He didn't lie to Jared. It wasn't like Jared had asked if Justin had tried to contact him. Jeff wouldn't know to tell Jared to ask that anyway.
"Good." Jeff reached back to grip the doorknob. "I'm going to go back before he notices where I went, though I'm sure you'll tell him I came by and that's fine with me. But I'm gonna be visiting a lot more, just to check up and see how he's doing. We'll talk again."
~*~
To: Pete
From: Jensen
Subject: If I die, you have to come hide all my porn
Because really, Mack can't show up and find my porn. You can have it.
Also, why didn't anyone point out that maybe I should see if Jared had a big brother who was actually bigger than him before I decided to rob the cradle?
~*~
To: Jensen
From: Pete
Subject: Re: If I die, you have to come hide all my porn
Can I have your sex toy collection, too? I paid for a lot of it!
And like you would have listened. How'd he find out about you and Jared anyway? He's not okay with it? What about the rest of Jared's family?
~*~
To: Pete
From: Jensen
Subject: Re: Re: If I die, you have to come hide all my porn
The toys are all yours.
Jared told him. He actually took the gay thing really well. Then he found out I'm almost 23 and went a little insane.
~*~
To: Jensen
From: Pete
Subject: Re: Re: Re: If I die, you have to come hide all my porn
Okay, that's good then. You had to see the other shit coming. I mean, I love you, but Jared looks like he's sixteen in half the pictures I've gotten. He's just starting to look legal in the recent ones.
But since he has a brother, why haven't you hooked me up? Is he as hot as Jared?
By bigger than Jared, you mean....
~*~
To: Pete
From: Jensen
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: If I die, you have to come hide all my porn
I'm pretty sure Jeff is straight, but if you want to come hit on him for fun, go ahead. He's all yours.
But GROSS. I meant he's taller than Jared. I don't want to know anything else.
~*~
To: Jensen
From: Pete
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: If I die, you have to come hide all my porn
I could change his mind about guys. Aww, we can be brothers in law or whatever! Whatever, if he's taller than Jared, he's at least as big everywhere else.
~*~
"Can I ask you something?" Jared's head rolled on his lap. Chris and Sandy were whispering to each other on the chair. Tom and Tessa were making out on the loveseat, too drunk to bother moving to Tom's room to do anything else. Amanda had disappeared an hour ago with Kane's new drummer.
"Yeah. Ask whatever." Jensen ran a hand through his hair, too drunk to worry about what it might be.
"How many guys?" Jared asked. It was whispered, and his eyes were glazed from the alcohol, but he was serious.
"Jared? What'd you mean?" Jensen really wasn't sober enough to have this conversation.
Jared looked away from him, and bit his lip. "I guess you don't have to tell me. I was just wondering how many guys you'd been with and it's not a big deal. Jeff just asked if I knew and I didn't. I mean, I know you've done stuff."
Jensen was going to kill Jeff. He'd expected Jared to ask about his family or something. Not this.
"I'm sorry." Jared said when he didn't answer. "He was just being Jeff and worrying about STDs and stuff. It's not a big deal."
"It's okay. It's okay." Hell, Jared did have a right to know he was clean. He probably should have gotten tested before he even let Jared blow him. Chris had told him to do it and he'd forgotten. "Can we just talk about it when I'm not drunk?"
"Yeah, okay." Jared nodded, and pulled at him until he laid down on the couch next to Jared. "You mad?"
"No. Not mad." Jensen let Jared kiss him. Hell, he'd be lucky if Jared wasn't the one who ended up mad.
~*~
"Hey. Busy?" Jared asked as he walked in. He leaned down for a kiss when Jensen pushed back from his desk, but when he sat back on the couch, he didn't pull Jensen with him.
"Nothing that can't wait." Jensen sighed and turned in his chair to face Jared. "We're gonna have to talk now, aren't we?"
"It's not that bad." Jared chuckled. "I promise I'm not going to break up with you over anything. I never thought you were a virgin, dude."
"It's pretty bad." He'd had to call Pete and work together just to come up with numbers.
"Okay." Jared rolled his eyes. "Just give me a number and we'll go from there. It's not that big of a deal."
"Okay, but um, what counts exactly?"
"What counts?"
"Some people count from handjobs, some from blowjobs, and some from fucking. I don't know what you want." Pete swore blowjobs counted as sex and Jensen was just pretending they didn't to make his number lower.
"Oh." Jared paused, thinking. "Just give me two numbers. How many for sex and then how many total for all of that."
"And you promise not to break up?"
"Yes. Dude, I didn't go into this thinking you'd never had sex." Jared smiled. Fuck. Jared was probably expecting him to say twelve people or something.
"Thirty-three."
Jared didn't say anything, and Jensen couldn't bring himself to look up at Jared's face.
"Is that the total number?" He asked finally.
"It's the number for fucking."
"Oh." Jared was going to break up with him. "What's the total number?"
"Fifty-four."
"Fifty-four," Jared repeated.
"You promised not to break up with me." Not that Jensen really thought he could hold Jared to that now.
"I'm not breaking up with you. I'm just," Jared hesitated. "I'm not sure how to process that."
"You're mad."
"I can't be mad about stuff that happened before we were together," Jared said. "They were all before that, right?"
"Yes! Jared, I'd never." Jensen shook head. "I haven't been with anyone else since October."
"October?" Jared smiled a little. It was a whole month before they'd gotten together. Maybe that would save him.
"I couldn't get into anyone else after the thing with Justin, when you wouldn't let him come in."
"Yeah?"
"Dude, you were all over me! I would've just been pretending they were you anyway." Jensen shrugged. "Does this help me?"
"A little. I'm not mad anyway." Jared groaned. "I just don't see how you never caught anything."
Jensen sighed. This was just getting worse.
"Just tell me." Jared sighed, not meeting his eyes.
"I got syphilis. Once. But I got treated and I was a lot more careful after that." Pete had laughed at him. Chris had yelled at him about safety and threatened to force him to watch a high school safe sex video until he promised to start using condoms for blowjobs.
"You had syphilis."
"It was last spring and only Chris and Pete knew about it, so I'm hoping you won't tell anyone." Mike would have a fucking field day if he ever found out and Lexi would kick his ass.
"Pete?" Shit. He'd mentioned Pete before, right? Maybe not.
"He's just a friend."
"Who knew you had syphilis."
"Okay, he was more than a friend a long time ago. But it was years ago. And we weren't really more than friends with benefits then. You'd like him if you met him, I promise. He just graduated already and moved to San Francisco. I just told him because I was freaked out and we're good friends."
"You're good friends and I've never heard about him?" Jared gave him the puppy eyes.
"Not on purpose. Really. He knows about you. If you want, I can call him and he'll probably tell you all kinds of embarrassing things about how much I like you and how much I freaked out when I thought you were interested in someone else." Jensen dared to reach forward and rest his hand on Jared's knee.
"Yeah?" The corners of Jared's lips came up just a little.
"Yeah. I'm kind of dreading the day you finally meet him. If I didn't tell you about him, it was only because he's going to tell you everything I ever said about you."
"Like what?" Jared asked.
"Is this going to actually help me out or just make me look stupid?"
"It can't hurt."
"Right." Jensen tried to think of something that would help him without making him look too stupid. "Remember when you started crashing on my couch every time Chad kicked you out?"
Jared nodded, but he didn't say anything.
"I got so used to it and talked about you so much that Pete pointed out I couldn't sleep when you slept in your own room. All my friends would bitch that I was cranky some days, but Pete figured out what was making me sleep better other days."
"Really?" Jared grinned and pulled Jensen from the chair to sit next to him on the couch.
"Yeah."
"I still need time to get used to this number," Jared said, but he wrapped his arm around Jensen's shoulders and kissed him before he backed away and stood up. Jensen nodded. Jared said they weren't breaking up. He wouldn't say that and then change his mind.
Jensen's confidence lasted about ten minutes after Jared left. He picked up his phone to call Pete, but what if that just made Jared mad? He hadn't meant to never talk about Pete, and now Jared was paranoid there was something shady about him. Was he even allowed to call Pete?
Jensen laid in bed an hour, thinking about all the reasons Jared was never going to get over this shit before he caved and called Pete anyway. He couldn't think of how to fix it and if he didn't call Pete and get help, Jared would just dump him anyway.
"Hey baby!" Pete answered.
"Jared thinks I'm a whore." Jensen figured he might as well just get right to it.
"What? I know he didn't say that."
"I told you he was going to freak out when I called you to help me figure it out. He just stared at me."
"I'm sure it's not that bad. He knew you'd been with other guys."
"He said he couldn't believe I never got anything."
"Shit. Did you tell him?"
"Yeah. Should I have lied?" He didn't want to lie to Jared, but maybe he should have. He could have cut a few of those guys out on technicalities or something.
"No. Jenny, lying's worse and he might find out. Is he really freaked out?"
"He said he'd be fine, but he was freaking out and then I mentioned something about you, I don't even remember what anymore, but I guess I'd never mentioned you before. I don't know why, but then he got paranoid about you."
"Okay. Wait. What'd you tell him about me?"
"That we were just friends and you knew about him. We'd been more before, but not anymore? I tried to be vague and I told him that if he ever met you, he'd probably like you. You'd tell him all the embarrassing stuff I say about him."
"Okay. That's not so bad. Maybe he'll be okay if you give him some time to just get over it."
Jensen looked back as his door opened and Lexi walked in. She pointed to the phone and he mouthed Pete.
"What's fifty-four? Tell me fifty-four isn't the number of people you've hooked up with," Lexi said, sitting on the bed next to him.
Jensen groaned. "Why are you asking?"
"I was going home and I heard Jared and Allie talking. I didn't want to interrupt because they didn't sound happy. Allie just kept saying, 'Fifty-four? Seriously? Fifty-four?' and Jared said something about living up to that. And then Chad almost caught me listening so I came here."
"See?" Jensen said into the phone. "Jared thinks I'm a whore."
"Okay. So maybe he's freaking out a little. This is still fixable."
"How? If you've got a fucking plan, tell me already."
"Have you been tested since you started dating?" Pete asked.
"No." Jensen jerked away and turned down the volume on his phone when Lexi hit him. "Chris told me I should, but I forgot, so don't tell him I didn't."
"Okay, then what you really need to do is go get that done. And not just the blood tests. Get all of them so you can show him you're clean. Then just remind him you're not comparing him to anyone. And talk about me more. Because I'm awesome."
"Because you're awesome?"
"Yes, and because he's not going to think it's weird if we talk if it doesn't look like a big secret."
"Okay." Pete had a point. He should have gotten tested months ago and it might make Jared feel better.
"Awesome. Now give the phone to Lexi. I need to tell her something."
Jensen handed the Lexi the phone, but she scrunched up her nose at whatever Pete said. "Eww. Oh my gosh. Yeah, I'll go with him and make sure he doesn't run."
~*~
Jared had avoided him for four days, but he was trying to be subtle about it. It wasn't that he didn't see Jensen at all. It was just that Allie was always there. He'd even claimed Chad had insisted that Jared had to help him study. At least Chad seemed confused by the whole thing, and he'd quizzed Chris a million times to find out if Sandy knew what was going on until Jensen finally decided that Allie was probably the only one who actually knew anything. The only thing Amanda seemed to know was that sex really wasn't happening and no one would tell her why. Eliza asked if they were having a fight because she hadn't heard moaning in a long time.
"Jensen, don't you get your results today? Do you need me to hold your hand or something to get them?" Lexi climbed onto his bed and snuggled against his side.
"No. I called. Then I picked up paper copies. I guess it's not that unusual for people to want proof to show someone."
"But you're clean, right? Because you're quiet and depressed, and I promise if you have herpes I'll still love you."
"I'm clean. But thanks." Jensen wrapped his arm around her. "I don't know if this is going to do any good. He ditched me for Chad yesterday."
"Chad was having a freak out about how he was going to flunk out of school because he got Ds in half his classes last semester when he was rushing. Jared was teaching him trig. I don't think he's really avoiding you."
"Maybe."
"It's only been four days, Jensen. You're the one who freaked out and paid to rush your results. Get up, go talk to him. The worst he's going to say is that you're not getting laid for a while. He's planning to lose his virginity to someone who's had sex with thirty-three people. He's allowed to be a little freaked. So probably no birthday sex. But it'll happen eventually."
"Thanks." He could deal with no birthday sex, if he could just have some damn time alone with Jared again.
"Okay, get up. I'm not watching you mope for no reason. Jared's in his room." Lexi got up and pulled at him until he stood up. "Come on."
"I officially don't agree with this." When Jared thought he was being pushy, he was blaming this all on Lexi. She was the one pulling him down the hall against his will.
When Lexi opened Jared's door and shoved him in, Jared looked up from the book he was reading and Chad looked away from the TV.
"Hang out with him. Apparently four days without alone time makes him think you're breaking up with him."
"Lexi." Jensen was going to kill her.
"Seriously. He's going to cry. Just snuggle him." Lexi turned to Chad. "Come on. I'm going to go sit in Starbucks. Sophia just started working there. I'll let you pretend we're friends so you can stare at her."
"I wasn't going to cry," Jensen said after the door closed behind them. He wasn't. Lexi just liked to make a scene.
Jared held out his hand. "I wasn't trying to avoid you."
"You weren't?"
"Okay, maybe a little the first day, but not the last couple days." Jared tugged him onto the bed, pulling Jensen against his side. "I really did have something to do with Jeff, and Chad can apparently do just enough math to figure out he really needed to pass trig."
"I got tested." Jensen mumbled, pulling out the papers he'd shoved into his pocket in the clinic and handing them to Jared. "I should've done it before."
"I'd say you didn't have to do that," Jared unfolded the papers and glanced through them.
"But I kind of did?" Jensen finished. "I'm sorry. I know I should've done it already."
"Yeah, but you're okay, so I can get over it." Jared flipped to the last paper. "Wow, you really got tested for everything."
"I'm never having sex with anyone else again. You know how they test guys for Chlamydia?"
"No. Do I want to?" Jared chuckled, pressing a kiss to the top of his head.
"No. But you need to appreciate that I got a swab pushed in my dick for you." Jensen cringed at the memory. If Lexi hadn't sat there and made him stay, he would have decided that it didn't matter if he got tested for everything. Pete knew and didn't even warn him, that asshole. "It was traumatic. I'm scarred for life."
~*~
Jensen should have seen it coming when he walked out of organic and saw Justin sitting on the bench right outside. He'd called twice the day before and actually left a message asking Jensen to call him the last time. Jensen had deleted the message. Jared had just gotten over the sex thing. If he knew Justin was calling, he'd just get upset all over again, and if Chris found out, he'd go crazy. Chris had just started to back off because Jared was around all the time. Jensen ducked back inside before Justin could see him. Avoiding Justin was worth going the long way out the back door.
Not that it stopped Justin from calling right after Jensen got home. He ignored the call, but when Justin called again five minutes later, he picked up before he could remind himself of all the reasons he shouldn't.
"When I don't answer, that's a hint to stop calling me," Jensen said before Justin could say anything.
"I always answered for you," Justin said.
"I broke up with you. I told you not to call me. You've been calling every few weeks, and I'm not answering. What makes you think you should keep calling?" Jensen tried not to yell. If one of the girls heard him, Jared would find out. If Sandy heard him, he was really fucking screwed.
"Jensen, just listen to me for a second."
"No. I meant what I said. I'm not doing this shit anymore. I'm done. I've moved on."
Justin didn't answer right away. Jensen was just about to hang up when he did. "You've moved on?"
"Yes. I have a boyfriend. A boyfriend whose friends know about me. His brother knows about me. He's fucking amazing, so give up. Stop calling me. Don't show up and try to see me. I'm happy. With him."
"I get your fucking point, okay? He's better than me."
"Jared's a lot fucking better than you. So just leave me alone, okay? Stop calling."
"He's that much better, huh? The sex is better? Because I remember us being pretty damn good then." Justin was yelling now.
Shit. Jensen froze. He was just about to agree. It wasn't a lie. Pete counted blowjobs as sex anyway.
"So the sex isn't?" Justin said before Jensen came up with anything.
"I didn't fucking say that!"
"So what? It's not good or are you just not having it?"
"It's none of your business if we're having sex or not," Jensen hissed.
"Which means you're not."
"What I get is still way fucking better than anything you ever gave me." Jensen hung up before it could get any worse.
Shit. Maybe he'd be lucky and Justin would just get the point.
~*~
Jensen's cock was in Jared's throat. Jared had fucking swallowed instead of pulling back like he always did. He couldn't be blamed for how much noise he made. His brain couldn't even think when Jared was sucking and then fucking swallowing every other time he took Jensen's cock into his mouth. Jared's hands pinned him to the bed, pressing down as Jensen struggled to resist bucking into his throat.
"Best-birthday-present-ever." Jensen couldn't even fucking care if anyone heard him. Jared had only done this a couple months and he was already beating Jensen at his own game. He was never fucking sharing Jared with anyone. "Shit, Jared. I'm gonna come."
Jared pulled back as he swallowed, licking away the come that slipped out of his mouth and dribbled down his chin. That was going to be Jensen's jack-off image next time Jared was in San Antonio for the weekend. Jensen didn't bother resisting when Jared climbed on the bed and rearranged him so he was lying more on Jared than on the bed. This cuddling wasn't his fault. He just couldn't fucking move so there was no way he could resist wherever Jared wanted to put him.
"Okay, when did you learn to do that? Because I can't believe I'm going to have to ask you to teach me how to do something involving sex. I'm supposed to be the experienced one here." Not that he minded, but he was going to have to learn before Jared took away his title as the best giver of blow jobs. Not that anyone else would ever know. Shit. He needed to stop thinking he was going to be with Jared forever.
"Sandy's not as innocent as she pretends to be," Jared answered.
"Sandy? Seriously? Well, now I know why Chris was in such a good mood last week. Though I'm not sure I want to know how she taught this." This was why Chris should have caved and just let Jensen pick his girlfriends years ago.
"There may have been a banana involved."
Jensen laughed, but he couldn't help kissing the embarrassment away.
"Remind me to buy her something to thank her. Maybe that diamond from the Titanic would be enough."
"You're so easy. I should have just listened to Allie and not gotten you anything else for your birthday."
~*~
"Happy birthday," Lexi said, wrapping her arm around his waist when she found him on the porch smoking with Chris.
"Hey." Jensen squeezed the hands around his waist as he glanced behind her.
"Jared and Sandy are inside trying to get Amanda to put her shirt back on." Lexi rolled her eyes as she walked around to sit on the railing next to him. "Did they actually tell y'all that you can't smoke yet, or are you just hoping you can keep them from finding out so they can't say anything about it?"
"The second one," Chris answered for him, taking the last drag off his cigarette before dropping it and crushing the butt under his boot. "And you can't tell on me without telling on him."
"You know I wouldn't tell. It would take all the fun out of watching you both getting caught and try to act like you had no idea it would bother them." Lexi waved her hand in the air to chase the smoke away from her face. "Jensen's just going to get caught first and then tell on you so you can't make fun of him when Jared makes him quit."
"Jared's never said anything about smoking."
"No. He just moves away from people who are doing it, and you just happen to never do it in front of him." Lexi giggled. He was pretty sure she loved watching him get in trouble with Jared.
"Sandy hasn't said anything," Chris pointed out.
"To you." Lexi laughed and jumped off the railing. "Eventually you're both going to have to face it that you're getting all old and domesticated. You might even have to admit that you like it."
~*~
The hangover was bad, but it wasn't like he took some kind of drug that would make him hallucinate. The skin around Jared's eyes was purpled. His chest was scattered with scrapes and cuts, and there was another large bruise on his side.
"Jared! What the fuck happened? Jared!" Jensen reached over, shaking Jared's shoulder to wake him.
Jared groaned, pushing away from him and scooting back toward the wall. "Hey, dude, still waking up here."
"You have two black eyes. I wasn't so drunk that I don't know you didn't have black eyes when I passed out." Jensen reached for him, letting a thumb drift over Jared's busted lip.
"This is the one morning you wake up early? It's not even noon. You were way too drunk last night to be awake right now." Chris sat up in bed, rubbing his face and wincing when he rubbed over his own bruised eye.
"I had to throw up. I noticed this," Jensen gestured to Jared's face, "when I came back to bed. And what happened to you? Don't tell me you did this."
If Chris got in a stupid drunken fight with Jared, Jensen was going to kick his ass.
"Wait a minute. No way am I getting blamed for this shit. Though if we're talking about my eye, your boyfriend did that with his elbow. I swear if you and Jared ever break up, your next boyfriend better be some puny little guy. I'm not breaking up any more fights between these giant neanderthals fighting over you."
Shit. Shit. Jared got in a fight with Justin-a fight so bad that Chris had gotten hurt when he was breaking it up.
"Justin? You fuckin' got in a fight with Justin. How the hell did that happen?" This wasn't supposed to happen with Jared. Justin got into fights.
"Okay, we should go and let you guys talk," Sandy said from somewhere behind him. Jensen didn't look at Jared until the door closed behind them.
"He hurt Alexis," Jared mumbled, staring back at him with the eyes that usually melted him. This time it just wasn't enough.
"On purpose?" Even for Justin, that didn't sound right. Justin loved Alexis even if he'd done as shitty of a job showing it as he had with Jensen. "He just showed up and hurt Lexi? Is she okay?"
"Okay, maybe he just pushed her down and her hands are just a little scraped. But he shouldn't have even done that."
"No, he shouldn't." And he was sure as hell getting this story out of Lexi. "But you can't tell me you couldn't have avoided getting into a full-fledged fight with him, can you? And Chris's eye? I'm betting that could have been avoided too. Just how many people did it take to break up this fight?"
"Four? But in my defense, two of those people were for him." Four guys? Four guys to pull two guys off each other?
"That still means you didn't back off! It took two guys to get you off of him! And Chris got a black eye? What about the other guys?"
"They're fine. Well, I didn't really see Aaron again, but Alexis would've told me if he was hurt and Mike and Tom are fine. His eye was an accident and I'm sorry."
Fuck. Mike and Tom weren't small guys, and Chris had been in enough scuffles that he shouldn't have ended up taking an elbow to his eye.
"You can't just get into fights, Jared. You could get arrested or something! Fuck, I can't believe this." Jensen fell back on the mattress, looking anywhere but toward Jared. Sure, Chris had hauled off and punched Justin once, but they'd both backed off when he'd gotten between them.
"I said I was sorry, okay? Trust me, I heard that from everyone last night and I'm sure it's not over yet. But dammit, this isn't only my fault! He came here looking for me. He came here looking for a damn fight."
"You think I'm not ten times as pissed at him? But I expect that kind of stupid shit from him at this point. It's one of the million reasons I don't want to see him anymore. But I didn't expect this from you." Hell, it was Jared who always pointed out that he wasn't like Justin.
"So you haven't talked to him?" Jared asked behind him.
"What kind of a question is that?" Of course Jared would think Justin showed up for a reason.
"He knew you had a new boyfriend. He fucking knew we hadn't had sex. He said he'd been calling."
"Yeah, well, you could have just checked my phone logs while I was asleep. What'd you see?" It wasn't fair. It wasn't like he'd called Justin to try to get him back or something.
"I didn't look at your phone. I'm pretty sure Chris did, but I didn't. I'm just asking and hoping you'll tell me the truth." Jared put a hand on his chin, turning his face so he couldn't look away.
"I know I should have told you, but it's not like that, okay? I wasn't picking up. I wasn't even listening to the voicemails before I deleted them."
"But he's been calling? Since when?" Jared didn't sound mad yet, but that was probably going to change.
"Since I didn't let him in." Jensen sighed and tried to look away again, but Jared wouldn't let him. "Sometimes just once a week, sometimes more. But I didn't answer. I just didn't want you to worry. You're as bad as Chris and Lexi; except you just try to guard me all by yourself and I didn't want that. That shit drives me crazy and you know that."
"You still should have told me. That's four fucking months you've been lying to me."
"I never lied. You didn't ask." Okay, even he knew that was a shitty defense.
"I was supposed to ask? Do I need to just ask you random questions to find out anything? You know how I felt when he told me that? When he knew you hadn't told me?"
"So the solution was to punch him? To get in a fight like a teenager?" Yes, he'd fucked up, but if the fight was bad enough that Chris got hurt, it was bad enough that one of the neighbors could have called the cops. He could've been trying to find the money to get Jared out of jail.
"Well, technically that was after the fight. No, it was more having to listen to him tell me how he knew we haven't had sex that made me punch him. You wanna fill me in on how he knew that?"
Jensen closed his eyes, blocking Jared out for a minute. If he didn't think Chris would yell at him and shove him back in the room, he would have just gotten up and run. Jared wasn't going to forgive him for this.
"A couple days ago I answered."
"Why?" Jared's voice was tight. He was probably only holding back because if he exploded, he'd never get an answer.
"I just got sick of it. I was hoping if I told him off and told him I had someone else he'd back off. But clearly that just pissed him off. I didn't tell him we haven't had sex. He just asked something and I didn't answer fast enough and he figured it out. Then I just told him to leave me alone and hung up."
"And you didn't think that maybe you should tell me that? When you decide you want me to know anything that's fucking going on with you, let me know. I'll get Sandy to drive me home." Jared slammed the door behind him when he left.
Jensen didn't bother fighting the tears when Jared left. It was better to just get them out before Chris came back and saw him. At least the anger still made it easier to stop. Anger he could deal with. He'd half of his last relationship pissed off anyway.
"I asked him if you broke up," Chris said when he walked in. "He said he didn't think so, but he wasn't sure what you thought."
"I don't want to break up."
"Okay, then this is just a fight. Fights happen."
"Fights where people get injured?" He'd seen a few girls have screaming fits over Chris, but he'd never had to pull them apart.
"Okay, so maybe that's not so normal," Chris admitted.
"I know you're pissed about Justin calling."
"I was gonna leave that alone for a while."
"And just stalk me in case he came back?" When Jensen looked up, Chris just shrugged. "How'd the fight start? Did Justin just start swinging?"
"I don't know. Alexis would know. She was outside with Jared and Allie when he showed up. She ran inside and yelled at us that they were fighting. They were already pretty into it by the time we got out there."
"Did Justin really try to hurt her?" Even if he didn't see it, Chris would've found that out for sure if Jared was claiming it. He wouldn't just let Lexi get hurt.
Chris groaned into his hands and didn't answer right away. "I think that maybe Jared thought he did."
"Chris. I don't need you sugar-coating shit for me."
"Alexis said he didn't mean to hurt her. That's all I had a chance to ask about. Her hands were a little scraped up, but she wasn't bleeding or anything."
"How hard was it to break up?" Jensen wasn't sure he wanted to know the answer. "I know how Justin is, sort of, but I could always stop you and Justin from killing each other."
"That's because you got in the middle and I wasn't gonna go at you." Chris didn't point out that Justin never had either, but they both knew it.
"And Jared elbowed you in the eye."
"Justin didn't back off either."
"And I'm not dating Justin, and I don't want to fucking see him again. I already know he's fucking crazy when he's pissed off. What I need to know is if the guy I am dating was just as bad." Jensen looked down at the floor as he asked again. "So how bad was it? How much did it take Jared to back off?"
"Mike and I threw him in a cold shower. I pushed him down when he tried to get up and he just gave up."
"But he fought you all the way in the house."
"He pushed and he yelled. He wasn't going to attack us to get away. Yes, we had to drag him in, but he didn't go after us."
Jensen nodded and lay back down on the mattress. "Can you just let me sleep before you go at me with the Justin shit?"
"Yeah. There's Advil if you need it."
~*~
"I know Chris let you off easy."
Jensen didn't even bother asking how Lexi got a key to his room. "Does that mean you aren't?"
"You talked to him, and you didn't tell me!" Lexi pulled down his comforter flicked the side of his head.
"Fuck. I've already got a fucking headache." Of course, she already knew that. She was just fucking evil.
"You lied to me. I've actually asked you if he's called. So has Chris."
"Yes, I know, and I lied and he trusted me and now he's not going to trust me and he's going to be a creepy stalker again. He covered that much before he gave my phone back." At least Chris respected his hangover and said it all in one sentence.
"Chris doesn't have to deal with both of you."
"You talked to him?" He knew it happened sometimes, but usually she didn't tell him. She'd asked the first time Justin called her upset about something, but he knew it wasn't often and it was easier when he didn't know.
"I yelled. A lot. I may have made up some stuff about a restraining order." Lexi stood with her hands on her hips and kicked the bed. "You're so fucking stupid. If you'd just told us and told Jared, we could have watched out for him and Jared would have been prepared."
"This was different."
"Which makes you more stupid. You lied when you weren't even doing anything wrong-except for lying and hiding things from your boyfriend and your friends. Chris and I might have let it slide if you'd just told Jared."
Jensen nodded. It was better to just let her go on and wait until she was finished.
"If I think you're lying again, I'm going to start acting like Chris."
"I won't."
"I'm going to ask you regularly so you can't just omit." Lexi waited for him to nod again before she relaxed and sat on the bed. "I talked to Jared. I know you're freaking out that he's going to break up with you, but he didn't say that. I think he's just really upset."
"Did he actually say he wasn't?"
"No, but I don't think he thought he needed to. He got into a fight over you. If he's going to go crazy like that, he's not going to just walk away."
"Chris said you were there, and Jared, he said Justin hurt you?" Jensen pushed himself up to sit against the wall as he looked her over. "I would've checked on you when I got home, but Chris said you were fine."
"I'm fine." Lexi bit her lip, looking down before she elaborated. "Justin didn't mean for me to fall. Maybe Jared thought he did because he doesn't really know Justin, but it was an accident. Justin tried to catch me."
"And he pushed you so hard that he couldn't catch you?" He'd asked Tom already. Justin wasn't drunk.
Lexi shrugged, but she didn't answer.
"Lexi?" If Jared was telling the truth, he was going to apologize as soon as he kicked Justin's ass-but even Jared hadn't sounded so sure.
"You're gonna be mad. It's going to make it worse."
"I just want to know what happened. I need to know what happened. I can't just be mad at Jared if Justin really pushed you because I'd have hit him, too."
"He didn't. He just tried to make me let him go and I was kind of tipsy, so I lost my balance."
"So why didn't either of them help you? Your hand is scratched."
"Justin tried." Lexi took a deep breath before adding, "And Jared hit him."
"Jared started it."
"Justin was egging him on!" Lexi grabbed his hand so he couldn't pull away from her.
"And Jared couldn't have just made sure you were okay and gone inside?" Lexi was smaller than him, but she'd stopped Tom from starting a fight with Justin before. Hell, Steve had actually managed to turn Justin away without a huge argument all on his own. It was possible.
"Justin was pretty determined to confront him. He was trying to get Jared to hit him."
"Lexi, I can't just," Jensen sighed. "I can't just let it go. You know that. With Justin, even before it got bad I just kept letting things go."
"Okay, but all you did to deal with Jared so far was get upset. You were upset, and then he got upset. Maybe, when you calm down and talk to him he'll get it and realize why you need him to walk away from things like that. Then you can promise to tell him if anything ever happens with Justin again. You both screwed up. You can both apologize and promise not to do it again. He's eighteen. Justin was talking a lot of shit. You've gotta give him another chance to be the mature person."
"And I'm twenty-three, and I should've figured it out already."
"Justin's twenty-four. Really, from what I've heard about the rest of y'all, Jared's a prodigy."
~*~
To: Jensen
From: Pete
Subject: I love you...but you're an idiot
If you do something like this again, I'm sending Jared your modeling shots.
But anyway, I agree with Lexi. He's eighteen. If he understands why he can't fight every time he gets all jealous, then you should just forgive him.
Besides, it's kind of hot that he fought for your honor.
~*~
To: Pete
From: Jensen
Subject: Re: I love you...but you're an idiot
It's not hot. I'm not a girl.
~*~
"Why would they even make a video game of golf?" Jared asked when he stepped in the door. Jensen hadn't expected him to knock. Was it really so bad that Jared thought he had to knock?
"I don't know. I found it in the lost and found." Jensen shut off the game. It was by far the most boring thing he'd stolen from the lost and found yet.
"All my friends are sick of me. My plans for tonight are either hanging out with Chad or doing the reading for my class. So I'm kind of hoping you miss me." Jared bit his lip, head bent down as he looked up at Jensen with the trademark puppy eyes. There was no way he could do anything but reach out and pull Jared closer.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you I talked to Justin. I know I should have, but it really was just because I didn't want everyone to freak out." Jensen rubbed over the palm of Jared's hand as he talked.
"And if he calls again? Because man, I can't just randomly ask you every few days if he's calling. I'm pretty sure you'd start to get pissed off pretty quick."
"I'll tell you, but I'm pretty sure Lexi threatened him with something really horrible this time." Jensen sighed and tugged Jared's hand until he sat next to him on the bed. "I'm trying Jared. I know sometimes it doesn't seem like it, but I am. And I know I screwed up, but things were going so good, man. I just didn't want to do anything to mess it up. I knew you'd freak out and well, you did."
"I wouldn't have freaked out so much if you'd told me. I would've had some warning." Jared squeezed his hand before he let go to wrap his arm around Jensen's waist.
"And you wouldn't have gotten in a fight with him?"
"Okay, maybe I would've anyway. I'm sorry. I know that's gonna piss you off, but he came there looking for a fight."
"I know that. Okay? I do. And if I had any intention of talking to him I'd cuss at him for an hour. But man, you know what it felt like to wake up and see you like that? Do you know what I'd feel like if something happened to you, or the cops came and you got arrested because of me?" Jensen took a deep breath and leaned over to let his head fall in his hands. He couldn't just let this go if Jared didn't get it.
"I'm okay." Jared brushed a hand over his hair.
"But you might not have been. You're both big. You both went at each other. He could've hurt you or you could've really hurt him and paid for it." What would he have done if he had to explain to Jared's parents why he was in the hospital? If he had to figure out how to bail Jared out of jail?
"I know. It won't happen again, okay? I won't lose control like that. Okay? I promise." His hand brushed over Jensen's cheek, gently pulling Jensen up until he could press their lips together.
"I just. I can't worry that you're going to do something like that. I hated when Justin did that shit, and I can't do that again. I can't worry like that." Yes, he wanted to just get over it, but Jared had to get it.
"I know. I'm sorry. I just wasn't thinking. I'll think next time and I'll walk away. If there's a next time, I'll walk away." Jared watched him until he nodded and pulled Jared in for another kiss. If they had to fight, he wasn't going to turn down the make up sex.
~*~
"I told you to stop thinking so much." Steve slid a new beer across the table toward Jensen. "He probably told you he likes the pet name."
"I told you to play nice with Sandy and stay for all of spring break. You don't listen either." Jensen glanced to where Jared was talking to Sandy by the stage.
"Sandy doesn't want me around any more than I wanna be here." Steve shrugged, stole a drink of Jensen's beer and headed toward the stage, passing Jared on the way.
"Everything okay?" Jared asked, sitting close enough that their thighs touched under the table.
"I don't know." Jensen shrugged, watching as Steve met up with Chris on stage.
"He's still not talking?" Jared's fingered brushed against his leg or a second.
"Nothing." Jensen sighed, peeling the label off his beer bottle. "Sorry if we were being jerks. We were just trying to cheer Steve up."
"It's okay, but you might want to say that to Sandy later though."
Jensen nodded, taking a drink of his beer before looking at Jared. "But we're good?"
"Do you really think I'm going stay mad about that when we actually have a big bed?"
~*~
If Jensen loved it when Jared pushed him up against a hard surface and covered Jensen with his whole body, it didn't make him the girl. It wasn't like he hadn't done the same thing to Jared more than once. Besides, it wasn't like anyone knew about the noises Jensen made when Jared sucked just behind his ear-except Jared, and Jared wasn't complaining.
Jared was already moaning anyway as Jensen pushed off the wall and directed him to the bed, stripping Jared of his clothes as he walked backwards. Jared didn't even argue when Jensen licked down his neck and stopped to suck a bruise into Jared's skin. He just bucked up, pushing his cock into Jensen's thigh.
"So you like it when I call you baby?" Jensen couldn't help asking as he ground their cocks together.
"Fuck. Yeah," Jared gasped, turning his head to give Jensen better access to his neck.
"That's good. You know how often I almost say it everyday? It was probably gonna slip out one of these days when I was sober anyway." Jensen let himself smile for a second. He'd never live it down if any of his friends heard him say it, but it was worth the look Jared gave him and the way Jared kissed him, long and slow like they had all the time in the world. Jared's hand drifted down his back, and Jensen could feel a hesitation in the kiss. Jensen pulled back, holding himself over Jared as he pushed Jared's hair out of his eyes.
"Hey. You okay?" Jensen reached up to cup a hand around his jaw, stroking a thumb over his cheekbone until he felt Jared relax.
"Yeah." Jared's hand drifted lower, and he was blushing when he looked up to meet Jensen's eyes. "Can I? Can we?"
Fuck, he wished he knew something better to say. With all the sex he'd had, he'd never taken anyone's virginity. The closest he'd come was being the first guy Justin had slept with and he'd worried more about himself then. So instead of trying to think up the perfect thing to say, he kissed Jared again, holding Jared's face in his hands as he tried to tell Jared just how much he wanted this.
"Oh fuck yeah. Whatever you want." Whatever Jared wanted. He had to remember that. This time had to be about Jared. Besides, Jensen was pretty sure what Jared wanted wasn't any different than what he wanted.
"I don't really know what I'm doing." Jared bit his lip and looked over Jensen's shoulder. "I mean, I get the basics and all..."
"S'okay." Jensen kissed him again before rolling over to the edge of the bed and reaching for his bag to find the lube and condoms he'd packed. So maybe he'd been hoping. It wasn't like he was going to push. He just thought it was good to be prepared. "I can walk you through it."
Jensen rolled onto his back, pulling Jared on top of him. It wasn't his favorite position, but he figured it was a little early to ask Jared to fuck him on the bathroom counter. As it was, he could still feel the tension in Jared's muscles as they kissed. "Don't worry. Just kiss me. Get there whenever you're ready. It's gonna be amazing; I promise."
Jared trailed feather-light kisses down his chest, flicking his tongue over a nipple and biting lightly down his ribs. Jensen couldn't hold his moans as Jared stopped to suck a mark on his hip. He figured being a little loud couldn't hurt anyway. Jared could use the encouragement and everyone else was still at the club.
Jared's tongue licked a wet path up his cock and his hands slid under Jensen's ass. He squeezed just a little, and Jensen opened his eyes to a questioning look.
"Need you to get me ready a little." Jensen managed to say as he took the bottle of lube from the table so he could take Jared's hand and coat two fingers.
Jared nodded, licking over Jensen's balls as he slipped slick fingers down the crease of Jensen's ass to press the pad of his finger to his opening. Fuck this was really happening. Jensen moaned as Jared pushed the first finger inside. Fuck. He hadn't had anything besides his own toys in months. He shifted, pushing Jared's finger deeper. Jared didn't seem to need as much help as he thought, he was already crooking his finger until he hit just the right spot.
"Right there, baby. Right there," Jensen whimpered writhing on the bed as Jared stroked over that spot again and again. He added another finger, sucking Jensen into his mouth as he did.
"Fuck, Jared. Fucking amazing." Jensen reached down, tugging his arm until he let Jensen's cock slip out of his mouth and climbed back up to kiss him, Jared's tongue slipping into his mouth as his finger fucked Jensen open.
Jensen pulled back, threading his fingers through Jared's hair.
"I'm good," Jensen gasped into his ear. He'd waited over three months for this and he already felt like he was going to explode too early if they didn't move on. "Inside me. Please, Jared. I wanna feel you."
Jared fumbled a little as Jensen helped him roll on the condom and slick his cock with lube. Jensen had to force away a smile as he tried to arrange them. Jared hadn't blushed this much from sex since Jensen begged to blow him.
"Just go slow, okay?" Jensen said as he pulled Jared to him. Fuck, he knew Jared was big, but he didn't realize he'd underestimated how relaxed he was. Or maybe he just wasn't used to the burn anymore.
"Jen?" He started to pull back, but Jensen caught his hip before he moved.
"S'okay. I'm okay. Keep going." Jensen took a deep breath, willing himself to relax as Jared pushed the rest of the way inside. "Fuck." Jensen kept his eyes locked with Jared's, willing Jared not to freak out and pull away. "Just stay there for a minute. Just been a while since I've done this."
"I'm hurting you. I don't wanna hurt you."
"S'okay. It's just part of it. S'already getting better." Jensen shifted, fucking himself on Jared's cock until the burn gave way to pleasure and he needed so much more. "Oh yeah, so fucking good. Move for me."
Jared pulled back slowly and pushed back in, thrusting so slowly Jensen felt like he was going to explode.
"Fuck. So fucking amazing." Jensen's head fell back and his fingers twisted in the sheets. He needed Jared closer. He needed more. It took all of the little sense he had left to help Jared move his arms so Jensen could wrap his legs around Jared's waist and pull them chest to chest.
Jensen pushed up against Jared, finding friction against the hard muscles of Jared's stomach as Jared kissed him. Fuck he was going to come early and he didn't even care. He'd gone way too long without this. Jared must have sensed it, because he picked up the pace, thrusting harder and faster until Jensen came in a sticky mess between them.
Jared buried his face in Jensen's neck as he came after Jensen, his breath hot in Jensen's ear as he gasped "Oh god, I love you."
Jensen tried not to react to the words as Jared collapsed on top of him. It was the first time Jared had sex. Jensen couldn't hold him responsible for that. He waited until Jared's breathing evened out before he spoke.
"Okay. Jared, if we don't move, we're going to pass out like this and it's going to be really gross in the morning."
"You're so romantic." Jared rolled his eyes, but he gave Jensen a tiny grin as he pulled out and found a towel to clean them off.
"Yeah, well, one of us has to be practical." Jensen grinned, letting Jared pull him close. He was almost asleep when Jared spoke again.
"Jensen?"
"Hmm?"
"Um. That thing I said." Jared's hand tightened on his shoulder. Shit. He could deal with Jared saying it in the heat of the moment, but he couldn't deal with Jared actually taking it back.
"Jared," Jensen didn't try to look at him. He didn't want to see the relief on Jared's face. "It's okay. I'm a guy, I know with sex, stuff just slips out."
"I meant it," Jared whispered.
Jared meant it? Jared loved him. Jensen finally forced himself to meet Jared's eyes.
"Really?"
"Yeah."
Jensen couldn't help smiling as he relaxed against Jared again. If he snuggled a little closer, it was because he knew Jared would love it.
"Me too."
~*~*~
