Chapter 2 - Ten Years Before


Shannon hated waiting. He sat astride his bike in the shade under a crooked elm tree and thought about how lame it was to be hanging around outside the school on the Friday afternoon. A spring Friday afternoon, he reminded himself. The chilly winter weather had finally begun to give way to summer in the last couple weeks. Now the sun was shining, a fresh breeze was blowing, and he was sitting outside the school.

Letting out a frustrated breath, Shannon glanced back toward the front doors. He didn't have to wait, he knew. He could ride over to the arcade and see who was there, or to the gym where some of the older guys might be hanging out. Or, he could just go home, where he would surely find an empty house, with a note on the table (if he was lucky) and a TV dinner in the freezer. As much as he hated waiting, he hated being alone even more.

So he waited.

Aside from not wanting to be alone, he also needed to know. He'd done something stupid the day before. Deeply stupid, he told himself harshly. At the time, he'd wanted to just vanish from the face of the earth, but that hadn't happened, and now he needed to know if he still had a best friend. A knot had been growing in his stomach all day, and it tied itself into a bigger and more complicated knot every second that he sat there. He tried to think of what he was going to say, but everything sounded childish or idiotic in his head, and he was afraid it would come out sounding even worse.

Shannon was jolted from his thoughts when the school doors finally opened. Despite having just come from yet another meeting with the principal, Jeff was smiling, bouncing slightly as he came down the walk. Shannon felt his stomach twist, but he turned his bike and rode over to join him.

"What did he say?"

Jeff's grin widened. "Same old crap. I'm wasting my potential. If I'd just apply myself, I'd do just as well as Matt. Blah, blah, blah."

"No detention?" Shannon found himself smiling back, tension eased by his friend's good mood.

"Nah."

"Lucky bastard."

Once again, Jeff had been so distracted by a drawing he was working on, he'd failed to hear the teacher calling his name, then he had given her a hard time when she tried to lecture him about paying attention.

"I don't need algebra," he'd said, to the amusement of his classmates. "I'm either going to die young or become a rock star."

Shannon hadn't been there to witness the scene, being three years behind his friend, but it had been the main topic of conversation in the halls as school let out.

"Are you coming over to our place?" Jeff asked as he shrugged on his backpack and grabbed his own bike.

Suddenly Shannon remembered his uncertainty. He blushed furiously, his eyes dropping to the ground.

"Yeah, if you want me to…if you don't, that's cool. I can stay away."

Jeff reached out and put his hand on the smaller boy's shoulder. "Hey, I told you yesterday. It's all right. I'm not mad or anything."

He HAD said the same thing yesterday, but hearing it again made the knot in Shannon's stomach loosen. Or maybe it was the gentle squeeze Jeff gave his shoulder. He lifted his head again and met Jeff's eyes. For just a moment, he thought he saw exactly what he wanted to see there. Then Jeff's grin quirked up again, and he ruffled his hand through Shannon's blonde hair.

"Come on, Shan. Let's get out of here."

~~~



"Sometimes bad leads to good," Jeff's mother had told him once, long ago. "It's easier to have faith if you just remember that." At the time, he hadn't understood it, and later, as she grew sicker, he hadn't believed it. A long time passed after she died before he began to realize that it was true. He didn't know if it gave him faith, but he understood.

Shannon was like that. Jeff had known his for years, but it was only in the past few months that they'd really become friends. It had all begun when Shannon's dad was in a terrible accident, leaving him paralyzed and the rest of the family falling apart. Familiar with that kind of pain, Jeff had been drawn to Shannon. They'd started hanging out more, talking for hours. Little by little, Shannon had begun to find his smile again, and that made Jeff very happy.

It also scared him, though. Jeff often told people that Shannon was like a little brother to him, but that felt strangely like a lie. There was only one person other person in the entire world who he felt closer to, and that was his brother. There were even things he could talk to Shannon about that he couldn't with Matt. In small ways, he felt like Shannon understood him better than anyone else. Not completely, but a little, and that was enough for someone as chronically misunderstood as Jeff. Still, he couldn't make himself think of Shannon as a brother. Something in the back of his head wouldn't let him, and he had never understood why.

Then, yesterday, Shannon had kissed him. It had been brief, and strange, and surprising, and Jeff hadn't decided how he felt about it just yet.

Shannon had come over to practice some new wrestling moves. Afterward, they had both lain on their back in the middle of the trampoline, talking and staring up into the bright blue sky. It had been just like a dozen other afternoons, except this time, during a pause in the conversation, Shannon had leaned over and kissed him. In his nervousness, he'd nearly missed Jeff's mouth completely, and he jerked back almost as soon as their lips touched, but his intentions had been clear. Before Jeff could even react, Shannon had bolted.

After recovering from the shock, Jeff had practically had to tackle the younger boy to stop him. Unable to look at him, Shannon had stammered out a string of frantic and breathless apologies. It took a few minutes for Jeff to get a word in, and then he'd tried to reassure Shannon that he didn't hate him, that he wasn't an idiot, that he wasn't going to tell anyone. Shannon had been too upset and flustered to listen. Making some lame excuse about having to be home early, he'd turned and run off again and Jeff had let him go.

There was no denying the relief that had flooded through him to find Shannon waiting for him after school. He'd been afraid Shannon would never speak to him again, and he didn't think he could bear the loss of their friendship. Just seeing his smile made Jeff think that everything was going to be all right.

Later Jeff wouldn't be able to remember which one of them suggested it, but they decided to take advantage of the warm weather, bypassing Jeff's house and riding straight to the lake. They left their bikes at the top of the hill, making their way down through the thick brush on foot to the water's edge. It became a race at the end, a race Jeff won by being the first to shed his shoes and shirt and make the leap into the water. Shannon came shortly behind with a neat cannonball. Both of them cursed at the frigid water, but stubbornly refused to get out. For nearly an hour they swam, splashed, dared each other to jump from higher and higher rocks, and forgot about any tension between them.

Eventually, they climbed up to sit on one of the rock ledges that overlooked the lake and sat in the sun to dry. They talked about school, baseball, their plans for the summer, but soon they fell into a comfortable silence.

It was during that silence that Jeff found himself looking at Shannon. Really looking. Shannon had been a slightly pudgy kid, but in the last few months, his baby fat was disappearing in exchange for muscle, a result of long hours spent training in the ring. His fine blonde hair was getting long, nearly to his shoulders now. He brushed it absently out of his eyes as he glanced at Jeff. He had green eyes too, but they were darker, with hints of gray where Jeff had gold. Lost in his own thoughts, it took him a moment to realize that he was staring at Shannon and Shannon was staring back. He shifted his gaze quickly, but it was too late.

"Jeff?"

Jeff kept his eyes on the lake beneath them, feeling an unfamiliar blush rise in his cheeks. "Yeah?"

There was a beat of silence, then Shannon quietly said, "Nothing. Never mind."

Jeff looked at him again and saw the sadness tugging down the corners of Shannon's mouth, further darkening his eyes. He felt a pang of guilt.

"Shannon, about yesterday..."

"I don't really want to talk about it."

Taking a deep breath, Jeff said, "I do."

Shannon shrugged, his head turned away.

"I meant what I said," Jeff told him. "I'm not mad."

Gaze still firmly diverted, Shannon nodded. "Okay."

"I was just surprised, is all. I didn't really know what to do." Jeff watched Shannon for a second, cursing inwardly. "I don't want us to stop being friends."

"Okay." Shannon's voice was small. Jeff suspected that he was crying, or trying hard not to.

"Hey, Shannon, could you look at me?"

Shannon didn't respond. After a moment more, Jeff caught his shoulder and forced his friend to turn and face him. There were tears shining in his eyes, not yet shed.

Without thinking, without allowing himself to think, Jeff leaned forward and kissed him. His aim was better than Shannon's, and he lingered for a second to take in the sensation of Shannon's lips against his. When he pulled away, Shannon's expression of utter shock made him smile. Shannon responded in kind, his shock slowly melting into delight.

"See, you're not such a idiot after all," Jeff said, his turn to look away, suddenly embarrassed.

"I…I didn't think you…" Shannon stammered. "I didn't really know if you…"

"I didn't really know," Jeff said quietly. "I still…I still don't."

"But…you just…"

"Yeah. I wanted to know what it would be like."

"Oh."

"It was okay," Jeff admitted, his smile returning, sneaking a glance at Shannon. "I've never...never really kissed a guy before."

Shannon nodded. "Me neither."

They were both quiet for a moment, but it was a comfortable quiet, like the kind they often shared before all this had started.

Then Shannon said, "Yours was better."

A little laugh escaped Jeff. "Gee, thanks."

"Do you think…could I try again?"

"Okay."

Shannon kept his eyes open, determined not to miss this time.

~~~



It wasn't long after that they headed back up the hill to where their bikes were stashed. They were joking around, being stupid and silly, and Shannon knew he was grinning like an idiot, but he couldn't stop. Yesterday at this time, he'd been kicking himself, sure that he'd lost his very best friend. Now, he was filled with a great sense of hope and excitement.

Like Jeff, Shannon had never felt this was about another guy before. When he'd first started hanging out with Jeff, he'd looked up to him, the same way most boys would look up to someone older, taller, and infinitely cooler. He was only just starting to think about girls and, somewhere along the way, he'd begun to think about Jeff as well. He'd been wondering for a while now what it would be like to kiss him, and yesterday he'd finally given in to the impulse.

That had been disastrous, but today, Jeff had kissed him back. Shannon felt a little tingle at the fresh memory, thinking about the way Jeff's lips had brushed against his. It didn't even matter that Jeff had been the first one to pull away in the end, or the one to suggest that they head home. All that mattered was the light in his eyes, the way he'd offered his hand to help Shannon up and then held it for a second longer than necessary. It was only a second, but that was enough.

Watching Jeff as they came out of the brush at the top of the hill, Shannon saw him stop suddenly, his entire body going rigid. Coming up to his side, he realized why.

There was a man standing in the path, next to their bikes. He was tall, at least twenty years old, wearing jeans and a t-shirt, with a baseball cap pulled down low over his eyes. He stood looking at Jeff, smiling.

"Hey there, boys," he said pleasantly. "Nice day for a swim."

Shannon was about to answer him when he caught sight of Jeff's face. There was no emotion in his expression, but his eyes were wide and bright.

"Good to see you again, Jeff," the stranger said then.

At the sound of his own name, Jeff started, but remained silent.

"Aren't you going to say hello?"

Jeff's head moved in what might have been a shake, but Shannon couldn't be sure.

"No?" Stepping closer to them, the man chuckled. "That's not very nice. I came all the way out here just to say hello to you. The very least you could do is say hello back."

Glancing back and forth between them, Shannon saw Jeff swallow hard before quietly saying, "Hello Pete."

"See, that wasn't so hard." The man looked down at Shannon then and his smile widened. "Aren't you going to introduce me to your little friend?"

Jeff seemed to come awake suddenly. Catching Shannon's arm, he gave him a not-very-gentle push toward their bikes.

"Let's go."

Still not sure what was happening, Shannon hurried past the smiling man. He'd just reached down to grab his bike when he heard Jeff make a strange sound. Looking back, he saw that Jeff had stopped, the man's hand on his arm. Jeff's head was bowed, eyes closed. The man whispered something to him that Shannon couldn't quite make out, then reached up to brush his fingers across Jeff's cheek. Jeff wrenched away, moving quickly to where Shannon was standing.

"Come on, Shannon. Let's get out of here."

Shannon couldn't help glancing back as they rode away, seeing the man lift one hand in a wave.

"Nice meeting you, Shannon," he called after them. "Be seeing you."

Jeff set a fast pace, and Shannon was breathless by the time they emerged from the woods and began to follow the road back to Jeff's house. Seeing him lagging, Jeff slowed.

"Who was that?" Shannon asked when he caught his breath.

"Nobody."

"Jeff..."

"He's nobody!" Jeff snapped. "Stay away from him."

"Why?"

"Because..." Jeff seemed to catch himself and shook his head. "Just...just stay away from him, okay?"

"Okay."

Shannon fell silent, but he didn't fail to notice when Jeff lifted a hand to rub his cheek, where the man named Pete had touched him so tenderly.

Read Chapter 3 of 15 of Baslady's Best Left Behind