Eeyore, a very gloomy, blue-gray donkey, is stuffed with sawdust. Despite this, Eeyore is a very intelligent animal, although he keeps most of his knowledge to himself. That's why he is very quiet most of the time and a bit depressed.

Eeyore lives at the 100 Acre Wood Southeast, in his 'Gloomy Place'. His favorite food is thistles. Eeyore loves being remembered on his birthday and hates being bounced.

Eeyore biggest problem is that his tail keeps coming off (he has lost it many times). His other concern is that his house keeps falling down (he has to rebuild it again, and again, and again.....) ~*~from "The History of Pooh…and Others"~*~

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Gloomy old Eeyore. That's my Matty. Well, he ain't always gloomy, but you gotta be around him at the right time. Most times, he's so serious about work and stuff that he forgets to smile. That's when I have to work my hardest. See, I love Matt, more than anything in this world. Hell, I love him more than I love myself, and to hear others tell it, I love myself a lot. Ain't true, though. I get real depressed sometimes and Matt will look into my eyes and say "Tigger, you ain't been very bouncy lately…what are we gonna do about that?" Then he'll take me shoppin' or to the amusement park or the movies, and he makes me smile again.

Matty's always been there for me, for as long as I can remember. He makes sure that I eat right and get to work when I'm supposed to. He teaches me all my new moves, and they're really cool! You should see 'em sometime, if you get the chance. People think that I take all those risks because I'm crazy and they're right - crazy in love. I'd never have the guts to jump off them high things if it wasn't for me knowing that Matt would be there to pick me up when I fall.

I fall a lot. I've fallen from real high places, off ladders, through tables, off the stage, almost everything you can imagine. But the best fall I ever took was when I fell in love with Matt. I know that most people think what we're doin' is wrong, but I don't give a damn. If it was supposed to be wrong, why does it feel so right?

I still remember the first time Matt kissed me. He had come home after me and Shannon had been messin' around and heard us talking about me being in love. I got upset and he was askin' me all kinda questions, then he asked me if he was the person I was in love with. I was pretty upset, cryin' and all, and he kissed me.

It was the best kiss I'd ever had, cuz it meant the most to me. It meant that Matt loved me as much as I loved him, the same way I loved him. And ever since that day, I ain't been so depressed as I used to be. That's why I got sad all the time - cuz I never thought that I could have the love of my life. And I thought I'd have to be lookin' for a substitute, someone who could be as good to me as Matty. But they never woulda been Matty, and that was who I wanted.

Matt's real good to me. If it wasn't for him I would still be mowin' grass and making sculptures outta people's hedges. I'm making a statue of Matt right now, outta aluminum foil. That's what I do when I have spare time. I make things. Matt says that the world is ugly enough without people makin' it uglier, so I try to make it prettier. Matt says I do that just by bein' me. We argue about that a lot, cuz I think Matt's the beautiful one, and he says I am, so we can't agree on it.

I wanted to make my statue of Matt real lookin', but he says I can't cuz Daddy and our friends would see it. And he said that the when I wrapped the foil around his dick, it hurt. I kissed it and made it better….hehehe. I like doin' that. But not as much as Matty likes it when I do it!!

Matty screams a lot. Not yellin' at me screamin', but "don't stop, Jeffy, I'm gonna cum!!!" screamin'. I like it. He said nobody else has ever made him scream like I do. That makes me smile.

But Matty ain't been smiling' much lately. He got hurt and he has to stay at home to get better. I call him ever day, and he calls me. I tell him I miss him, and I love him. I think he worries about me bein' here by myself. He says that he's seen the way some of the guys look at me, and some of 'em have even asked me out before, but I always tell 'em no. Can't tell 'em why, though, and that bugs most of them. But sometimes I think that Matt thinks I'm gonna get tired of him and find someone else.

And no matter how much I try, sometimes I can't convince him that I ain't ever gonna leave him. Without Matt, I ain't nothin'. Matt's the other part of my soul. It's like, before we were born, somebody split one soul and put it in both our bodies. That's how much I love him, cuz he's part of me and I'm part of him, and we'll always be together, no matter what.

So, I'm stuck here in some arena in some town that I can't remember the name of, and I'm in the ring, and I pinned Jay. Then I ran over to the corner rope and shot the guns at the camera…just for my Matty. And I'll leave and head for the hotel so I can be alone with him, even if it's just over the phone.

And when he gets all quiet, then I'll tell him what I'm gonna do to him when I get home. And he'll start to breathin' heavy and I'll ask him what he's doin', even though I know already. It makes me smile knowin' I can have that effect on him even when I'm so far away. And he has the same effect on me. I'll talk to him, and tell him what I want to do, and he'll tell me what he wants to do to me, and after we both get off, I'll tell him how much I love him. And even though I can't see him over the phone, I'll know he's smiling like me.

Then he'll say "Night, Tigger. Sweet dreams." And I'll tell him the same. And I'll go to sleep and have sweet dreams, where there ain't no gloomy ol' Eeyore…just my beautiful Matty, smiling' and laughin' and lovin' me like no one else ever can.