Chapter Twelve

Paul lay on his side with his head propped on one hand as his fingers moved lazily through his lover's hair as the older man slept. He'd felt restless since the woman and Raven had left. It was as if he could feel something big coming but he had no clue what it was. For so long he'd lived almost hidden from the rest of the world unable to have his own identity, his own friends, his own career as he was forced to live in the shadow of his brother's life. He had never craved the spotlight unlike his twin who seemed to crave it and depend upon it as most people did food, air, and water. God save the person who stood between him and the attention he demanded.

Shawn, who was one of the only good things Paul had gotten out of his forced enslavement to his brother's will, didn't understand why he didn't just stand up and say no. For all the years that he had spent around Hunter, Shawn still didn't fully understand the extent of his brother's evilness, but then to be fair most people didn't. Paul though wasn't lucky enough to have that option. Having grown up with Hunter he was painfully aware to the extent of how depraved and unconscionable he was.

As children he had often been forced to watch his brother's evilness at work. Tormenting other children was only the start of the terrible things that he had done. His only goal as a child had seemed to be to top one evil deed after the other. His actions were ignored when they could be by their parents and explained away or denied when they couldn't be. Sharing a womb with the psychopath hadn't saved Paul from becoming a victim of Hunter's either. Often he awoke to find his brother sitting on the end of his bed running his thumb along the edge of one of their mother's knives or turning the chamber of their father's gun. Sometimes he spent hours even days naked and locked in a closet bruised and terrified as he served some punishment his brother thought was just.

His first sexual encounters had come at the hands of Hunter or Hunter's friends. Often he'd laid in his bed with his face buried in his pillow begging for mercy he knew wouldn't come screaming from the pain being inflicted upon him, and crying for a death that never came. He lived in terror afraid to close his eyes at night not knowing what his brother would do to him next until sleep refused to come at all. Then in the irony of all ironies it was Paul they locked up not Hunter saying that he was suffering from mental exhaustion and delusions of tortures that never happened. When he got out he'd learned how to fake taking the little white pills they tried to shove down his throat and how to tell when his brother was faking taking his.

Through it all his one saving grace had been his writing and his dreams. As he grew up he longed to spend his life writing and painting. When he grew up and declared that he was a gay man his parents had taken that as the last straw and disowned him saying that he was the bad child and had broken their trust one too many times. After so many years of abuse at Hunter's hands Paul had no will left and had been easy pickings for his brother's plans and schemes.

It was Shawn's love and Sean's friendship that had saved him without them even knowing it. The only time Paul had ever stood up to Hunter was on Shawn's behalf and while he had paid a hefty price for it he would never regret it knowing in his heart that it had probably saved his lover's life. It was because of Sean that Paul had learned how to go behind his brother's back to accomplish things that fit into his fledgling wants and needs. Despite the fact that Sean had not believed him when he tried to tell him about himself and Hunter he understood. Like himself Sean was not the strongest minded person in the world and had been very much caught in Hunter's web at the time. Paul knew the evilness that his brother was involved in still. He knew the vast number of people his brother and his friends held at their mercy blackmailing them with past misdeeds done or even invented depending on their need even if he did not know all the things they were being blackmailed for. Time had shown him that being his brother's pawn could occasionally be a good thing. He was definitely much smarter for it.

When blue eyes opened slowly and lips curled into a sleepy smile, Paul lowered his head to capture those lips with his own. He knew every inch of his lover's body and yet never failed to marvel at the beauty of it or the fact that it belonged to him and him alone. When Shawn committed himself to Paul he had given up playing the boy toy for anyone that crooked his finger. Paul knew it and was thankful for it. Pushing the sheet off Shawn's body Paul let his eyes and hands roam over the gloriously tanned skin before his mouth gave into the urge to taste. Working his way down Shawn's body Paul savored each taste committing it to memory as he did each time he was in this position. When Shawn pushed on his shoulders to roll them over he didn't fight it knowing what his lover was seeking and needing it as much as the other man did. He watched fascinated as always as his lover stretched himself and Paul's body hardened at the show. When Shawn slipped himself over his lover's lubed and dripping cock, Paul's eyes darkened with a passion and devotion reading the love returned on the older man's face. When they came in it was a moment of miracles as Paul always felt it to be still disbelieving that after all the years of pain and torture that he had finally been given something so beautiful.

"I love you, Paul," Shawn whispered softly nestled up against him again and Paul closed his eyes and swore he would do whatever it took to keep this man safe.

Read chapter Thirteen of ?? of Monster in the Shadows