She sat in her car outside the arena looking nervously at the backdoor trying to gather her composure. Her car radio played an old mixed tape that had been given to her years before by her friends. Glancing at the sign outside the arena she read the message it read, "In Concert Tonight: Velvet Revolver."

It had been years since she had talked to the three she knew inside. Duff, Matt, and Slash had all faded away into their various addictions and having refused to stand and watch them slowly kill themselves or worse yet risk succumbing to the pressure and get caught up herself she had let things fade despite the fact that she truly cared for them, one of them more than the other two. Axl she had stayed in contact with, hence the reason for her nerves. Out of the group Axl had been the one that had respected her sobriety the most, probably because they shared common childhoods. Her father my not have been a religious man, but he had been a tyrannical bastard. She'd known these three men at their worst. She knew how to deal with their moods and rages and all the other bad things that came with their drugs and their booze. Sobriety though… she had no clue how to deal with that. She had no clue how to relate to the people behind the problems because she really knew very little about them, except Slash. Thanks to Axl she knew a lot about him.

Reaching forward she turned the ignition key and turned the car off. Reaching up she touched the backstage pass hanging around her neck and fingered the hard plastic as she wondered what she would find inside. She'd seen the latest video. She'd watched the scene between Scott and Duff and couldn't help but wonder… She'd seen scenes like that before in person. Watched them lead to hot sex and pleading moans. Back in the day you'd never been able to tell who the couple of the day would be Axl and Slash, Duff and Slash, Duff and Axl; but the one constant had been that she certainly would not be involved. Another reason why she had faded away, watching Slash and knowing that she would never get close enough to him to get what she wanted, what she needed, what she dreamed of had been killing her as surely as the drugs had been killing him.

Hearing a tap on her car window she jumped and turned her head to see Matt looking at her with laughing eyes and a smile on his lips. Blushing at having been caught she ejected the tape putting it in her back pocket so it wouldn't get ruined in the heat of the car and got out. No sooner had she hit the automatic lock button than she had been swept up into a massive hug and couldn't help but smile a little. When her feet were firmly on the ground she bit her lip trying to study him without being too obvious about it. When his first words came it proved she hadn't been too awfully successful. "I'm clean and sober Sam I swear." Samantha sighed and dropped her head studying the ground feeling guilty. "I know you are Matty. I'm sorry I just…" She would have continued but fingers were placed over her lips and looking up she saw him shaking his head looking at her seriously. "You don't got anything to apologize for or explain. If anyone does it's us. You were always good to us. You tried to stick around as long as you could. You listened to us say we were clean more than once. It's only natural that you'd be suspicious."

Samantha sighed and leaned back against her car. "Matty I don't doubt your sobriety I swear. I umm... well I kinda called Axl after I got the letter and…" Sam shrugged before looking back up at him. "He spoke up for y'all. It's not that I doubt you it's…" Sam sighed again as Matt watched her now confused. "Come on Matt, I've seen the three of you do things that shocked even me and that's tough. I've seen you live through things that shoulda killed you. I've watched you though your worse and lowest. I know how to deal with you when you're mean and Duff when he's weepy and Slash when he's…" Sam turned towards the building not finishing that sentence. "I just don't know what to expect from you guys now. I mean you may have told me a million times you were clean and sober, but you never were, not really anyway."

"I also know that y'all have to know that I have kept in contact with Axl cause that's the only way you could have gotten my address. Part of the reason I faded away was 'cause I got tired of the war. I got tired of being made to feel like I had to defend my friendship with him to y'all and my friendship with ya'll to him. Axl don't do that to me. My friendship with him has nothing to do with anyone else and he knows it. I won't justify my connection with him to anyone not ever again Matt not even for you guys."

Matt nodded and was about to speak when he heard his name called. Turning his head he saw a group of fans across the parking lot. "Crap, I can't get caught. I'm gonna be late for sound check as it is. Look, just come with me please? We can talk more inside. I promise that it'll all be cool and you're gonna love Scotty." Samantha looked doubtful but finally nodded letting him take her hand and pull her across the parking lot as they tried to outrun the fans. Once they got safely inside Sam sank to the ground looking up at a grinning Matt. "Jesus Christ some things never change with you people does it? Ya still gotta make me hoof it in my fuckin' boots." Matt laughed grinning bigger. "It makes your boobs bounce all around." Sam was about to yell at him when she heard a soft-spoken voice she didn't recognize. "Matt what kind of depravity are you up to now? What have I told you about tormenting the fans?"

Sam turned her head and got her first look at Scott Weiland. Tall and skinny with red hair and tattoos, legs incased in leather, skin and bones look, he was such an Axl comparison she had to fight not to make it. Remaining silent she remembered his words and cocking her head studied him again and listened as he quietly laughed and joked with Matt who was trying to explain whom she was. Finally understanding Scott nodded and smiling turned and offered a hand to help her up off the floor. "So you are the famous Samantha that I have been hearing so much about. I am most honored to meet you." Samantha let him shake her hand lightly and goose bumps formed on her arms as another comparison came to mind. "You're very intelligent aren't you?" Scott smiled shrugging. "I have been accused of being too smart for my own good one or twice." Sam nodded as her eyes grew. "Do you like wrestling? Do you wear skirts? Have this thing for pain?" Scott's jaw dropped and Matt's eyes got big as she heard chuckles coming up behind Scott and looked to see Duff and Slash coming to stand behind him with Duff laughing. "SEE! I told you she'd see it!" Sam nodded shivering. "That is just too fuckin' freaky." Scott sighed realizing what was happening and half turned to look at Duff again. "This Raven person again?" Sam smiled thinking of her friend. "Actually his real name is Scott too, Scott Levy. You remind me more of Scotty than Raven. Raven is…" Sam shuddered again thinking of the dark side of her friend. "Let's not go into him. He scares me. I like Scott or Scotty much better."

Again Scott turned to look at her cocking his head. "Scott or Scotty?" Sam nodded fast happy to discuss one of her favorite subjects. "Uh huh! See Scotty is what you would call a complex individual. He's more or less named the different parts of his personality. Sometimes he's Scotty who's playful and giggles but can be rather into himself. Then there is Scott and he's kinda uptight and stuffy, but will take care of and protect the people he cares about. Then of course there's Raven and well… He's…" Sam shivers again shaking her head. "Scotty don't let me talk to him much unless I catch him getting ready to work, which I gotta tell you is just fine with me." Matt looked from Scott to Sam and back wide-eyed. "Shit that's freaky! There's two of him!" Scott nodded seriously watching her. "Does he have my problems too?" Sam smiled softly again studying him and nodded slowly. When she spoke the affection she held for the other man was apparent in her voice. "Scotty is a troubled soul as well, but he's one of the dearest men I have ever met. No matter how many times he stumbles or falls he always tries again. Not everyone likes him because most can't really understand him. People look at someone and stop at the image on the surface because most people don't have the courage to truly be all of themselves. You can't do that with my Scotty. He isn't a one sided person. You could know him forever and you would still not know everything about him."

"It sounds like you love him." She heard Slash state and turning she studied him now. Slowly she nodded not sure how he would take this information. "Is he good to you?" Sam sighed looking off at a spot behind the men thinking about her love. "I won't lie. We've had our ups and downs. Scotty will probably unfortunately always be fighting his demons to some extent. His family is a lot of his problem and they aren't something one can easily cut out of one's life. But I know that and I know what comes with loving him and I know that every downward slide will eventually come an upward one. Every nasty argument and night spent in tears will be made up for with love and tenderness later. As time goes on the downward slides get farther between and I am thankful for that, but… I guess y'all taught me about those things. In some ways I have to thank you for that. If I didn't understand so many things when I met Scotty I probably would have lost him by now, but thanks to you all I can see beneath his problems and understand or at least try to."

"How can you give up hope?" Scott asked seriously. "If you think he can't win the battle he won't. Don't you know that he draws on your belief in him or your lack thereof?" Sam's eyes narrowed as she slowly turned her head towards Scott. Duff moved to step forward, but was stopped by Slash and Scott both of whom wanted to hear her response. "How dare you judge me. I have never and would never give up faith in Scotty. I will never stop helping him with his demons. NEVER!"

Scott grunted eyeing her. "Why not? You did it to them."

Sam missed the soft gasps in shock as her face paled and her lip began to quiver. "So that's what this is?" Sam turned angry eyes to Matt who had sent her the letter and the pass. "You said… Never mind I should have known." Sam turned her eyes back to Scott as Matt shook his head in denial not finding the words to defend himself. "You don't know crap about me. I never turned my back on them and I never stopped believing in them. I didn't leave because I'd lost hope. I left because I was running for my fucking life."

Tears began to run down Sam's face as she looked around at the former friends sad that this reunion had turned so ugly. "Scotty said that I should trust you. Scotty said that I shouldn't…" Sam shook her head and turning ran back out the door as Slash, Duff, and Matt looked on shocked and upset. "Damnit Scott what were you doing?" Matt asked angrily. "We were supposed to fuckin be making amends to her!" Scott scowled. "You don't have to apologize to every person in the world. You don't have anything to apologize to her for." Slash watched the door Sam had run through sadly. His chest hurt knowing once again they had hurt this friend who had never done anything but try and be there for them. "Actually jackass we do," Slash said and turning went to find a quiet place to play.

Duff scowled down at his lover. "Damnit Scott what the crap have you done?" Duff ran off after Sam hoping to catch her before she could leave the parking lot. Confused Scott looked at Matt who was watching him quietly.

"You shouldn't have said those things to her Scott." Scott frowned. "Apparently, but would you like to tell me why not?" Matt sighed and nodded heading outside, but instead of following Duff headed to the tour bus. Sitting down on the couch Matt watched Scott spread out in a chair wondering how to start. "Sam was… well she was like our own little guardian angel. She wasn't must more than a kid, but she was a huge fan and didn't have anyone to look after her. Axl hit it off with her and she seemed to have some magical calming effect on him so we had her around a lot."

"She was with them through a lot of things. When I joined the group she was already here. She mostly seemed to be caught between Axl and Slash, but she kinda took care of everyone ya know? Cleaning up after us, trying to keep us from ODing every night, just generally being there in any way she could never giving up on us. Gilby had this… thing for her, but Sam and Slash were…. Well not an item, but we all knew she liked him. I don't know what happened exactly 'cause I wasn't there that night. But one night she was out with Gilby and Slash and Duff trying to keep them all out of trouble. From what I understand Gilby put the moves on her only this time he didn't take no for an answer if ya know what I mean. Duff and Slash were there, but they were so fucked up they just laughed about it. They didn't… realize that she was trying to fight him off. Hell they didn't even believe that it had happened 'til a couple years ago when they heard Gilby had bragged about banging one of Slash's chicks. 'Til then none of us had believed her even though she'd never lied to us…"

Matt sighed. "We wanted to make amends. Slash especially. Her and him were close. She just… well you know his family. She was like a kid sister and some kind of strange girlfriend you would never fuck all rolled into one. I don't think anyone had ever really believed in him before that. I mean outside of his music that is. She really was important to him. I think he misses her more than he wants to admit. Sometimes I see him with this lost look in his eyes and I can tell he's thinking of her. She just seems to have this way about her of knowing what everyone needs. It's… nice being around someone who understands you and accepts you just as you are I mean. We figured you and her would hit it off. She'd do you good I think." Scott sighed. "Would have don't you mean? I think I screwed the pooch on that one." Matt shrugged and shook his head. "Not necessarily. If Duff catches her it'll be ok. He'll get her to come back and you can apologize. We all can apologize."

Duff found Sam sitting on the parking lot leaning against the tire of a car on her cell phone crying. "Please Scotty just hurry." He saw her look up sniffling as she noticed him standing there. "I love you too Scotty. Duff's here." Duff watched her nod listening to the man on the other end. "You won't have to do that Scotty. Duff won't do anything." Sam giggled softly. "He knows who Raven is." Duff couldn't help but smile as he watched her nodding as she listened to whatever the man was saying. "I'll tell him. I'll wait for you by the back door." Sam ended the call and looked up at Duff without speaking, but he could read the hurt and anger in her eyes. "I swear we didn't intend it to go like that Sammy," Duff said but Sam just watched him quietly. "I know you don't have any reason to believe us, but… I swear we didn't. We wanted to…" Duff sighed. "We wanted to apologize for… everything."

Sam pushed herself up off the pavement and stood looking up at the much taller man. "I should let Raven beat the fuck out of you just outta general principal." Sam said scowling then headed back to sit at the bottom of the steps leading to the backstage door. "I know," Duff said quietly as he sat down next to her. "You fuck heads call me a liar, laugh at me, and take the side of that… creep and then your fuckin' boyfriend accuses ME of not believing in you and turning my back on you." Duff opened his mouth to agree with her again, but ended up grunting instead when she hit him in the stomach. "Damn you hit hard. Where'd you learn to do that?" Sam turned and scowled at Duff. "I live with a professional wrestler remember?" Duff nodded and blushed lightly. "Oh, right." Sam was saved from having to say anything else by the arrival of a cab. Squealing happily she bounced up off the stairs and ran to the cab. Duff watched quietly as a man he recognized as Raven stepped out hugging her tightly. The glare he was getting from the man though didn't escape Duff's notice and he shivered slightly suddenly wishing that he had someone else out here with him. Not that he blamed the guy for being pissed and wouldn't hold it against him if he decided to really kick his ass, but it would be nice to know he would still be in enough pieces to make the concert that night. As Sam brought the man forward, Duff stood somewhat nervously. "Duff this is my Scotty. Scotty this is Duff McKagen." Duff nodded and held out his hand wincing slightly at the painful handshake. The man was definitely pissed off. "Scotty please don't break Duff's hand. He needs it later for the show," Sam said softly, but Duff didn't miss the pleased smile on her face. He had to admit to himself that he was glad the man was so protective. Sammy deserved someone who wouldn't let her be hurt again. "It's nice to meet you. Sammy deserves to be happy and from the smile on her face I can see you do that for her." Raven nodded studying Duff. "I try. I also protect her from people that try to hurt her and make her cry. So I would remember that if I were you." Duff nodded and turning led the pair inside thinking that it was going to be an interesting evening.

Slash sat on stage playing with his eyes closed trying to let the music calm him. When he felt a hand on his shoulder he turned to see Sam standing there quietly with a man he'd never seen standing off towards the back watching him like a hawk. Sam smiled looking back at Raven then turned her attention back to Slash. "Don't worry about him. He's just here for support." Slash nodded and turned his eyes back to Sam. "Sammy…" He started, but trailed off not knowing how to finish. Sam lifted a hand parting the hair from his face so that she could see his eyes. "There you go hiding from me Saul." Slash bowed his head at her use of his formal name having missed the sound of it coming off her tongue. "God Sammy I'm so sorry," Slash said his voice trembling and just set the guitar aside before he found her wrapping her arms around his shoulders. "I know Saul I know." Slash laid his head on her shoulder closing his eyes. He'd missed the way she understood him. He'd missed the way she just knew things without him having to tell her. "I owe you so much," he whispered and Sam sniffled shaking her head. "No Saul…" she started to say, but he cut her off pulling back and shaking his head. "YES I do. I have no clue how many nights you kept me alive. I don't know how many times I thought that I wouldn't make it without you. How many times I didn't think anyone understood my pain 'til you. You stood behind me and believed in me and was my friend and never once asked me for anything. Then the one time you needed me I let you down. Because of it I lost a friend that I can't replace. I miss that. I miss you. I miss my friend."

Sam smiled softly stepping forward to lay a hand on his cheek. "Saul, when will you learn that there aren't boundaries to friendship? There isn't anything wrong between us that can't be fixed with an 'I'm sorry'. I miss you too. I miss hanging out with you and talking to you. I would love you to meet my new friends and be a part of my life with Scotty. I miss your keen sense of fashion." Sam giggled pulling on a lock of Slash's hair and he chuckled pulling her in for a big hug then remembering the man behind her pulled back nervously eyeing him. Sam giggled as Raven came forward. "Relax Slash he'd had his raw meet for the day." When Raven chuckled Slash relaxed a little, but didn't miss the glint in the other man's eyes and knew that while Sam may have forgiven him this man wouldn't forget what he'd let happen and accepted that. It was only right after all and his Sammy deserved a man like that.

Later after the show Sam lay back in her Scotty's arms smiling as she watched the other Scott lying back in Duff's arms. It was nice to see Duff finally so peaceful and happy. She had talked to the other Scott before the show and he'd apologized for his harsh words. The concert had been wonderful, but in her heart she couldn't help but compare it to the old days and miss the old band if only just a little. She had a feeling though that this new one would grow on her. Matt had been right about the other Scotty. Once they had made peace he had sat and talked to her and her Scotty for a long while, and she couldn't resist the mothering instinct that was forming for him. Maybe it was the name, maybe it was the similarities to her Scotty, maybe it was the pain she felt lingering within him, but whatever it was she was fairly sure that they would grow to be close friends. Giggling she tried to picture Jeff and Doggie mixed in with these guys and couldn't help but think it would be an adventure for sure. For now though she was going to enjoy having her old friends back and enjoy the new ones she had made.

Then End?

Read the sequel Fall to Pieces