As far as he and Hunter went, they'd been pretty much glued to each other like they'd been back before their breakup. Most of the guys in the back had been happy to hear that they'd fixed things, but there were a few who were pissed and didn't think that Randy deserved a second chance. Randy hadn't been too surprised by those reactions; truthfully he'd expected a lot more people to be against the reconciliation. Contrary to popular belief, Hunter was a great guy and well-liked in the locker-room. When word of how Randy had walked over him and their friends had spread throughout the back everyone had nearly tripped over themselves to comfort the blonde while Randy had received several snubs and dirty looks. Since they were back together now and blindingly happy though, most of the guys had apologized to him and offered up well-wishes, which he'd graciously accepted.
With those thoughts in his head he rounded a corner only to have the smile die on his lips. There had been one person he hadn't had a chance to talk to since he and Hunter had gotten back together. Hell Randy hadn't really talked to him since before he'd broken up with Hunter in the first place. He'd been scared shitless of the man the whole three months he and Hunter hadn't been together so he'd put off calling him or seeing him while he was out. Now he was back and Randy knew that the time had come to face him. Whatever was going to happen was just going to happen.
With a deep breath Randy managed a weak smile and called out, "Hey Shawn."
Shawn looked up from fixing his coffee and smiled brightly at the younger man. "Hey, Randy, what's up man?"
Taking this as a positive sign Randy walked down the hall until he was standing next to the shorter man. "Nothing much. You?"
"I've been looking for you actually. You are one hard man to catch up with these days, Orton."
"Not if you try hard enough," Randy said with a nervous laugh. "Why have you been looking for me?"
"I've been meaning to talk to you about you and Hunter."
Randy looked away from Shawn and at the empty stretch of hallway behind the Texan. He didn't want to have to look at Shawn when the older man punched him. Yeah it was cowardly, but he just couldn't see the contempt in the eyes of his once close friend. The hand that fell gently on his shoulder was most unexpected and startled him enough that he found himself once again looking into clear blue eyes.
Shawn's smile was gentle and somewhat amused. "You look like you're half expecting me to kick your ass or something, kid."
"Can't say I'd be surprised about it if it happens."
"Why would you be thinking like that?"
"I know that you and him are still really close…and I know you know…what I did."
Shawn sighed and removed him hand from Randy's shoulder in favor of running his fingers through his hair. "Yeah I do know, and no I wasn't exactly happy about that shit either. You fucked him over Randy, you did, and you hurt him really bad. I hadn't seen him that fucking sad in a long time."
Randy closed his eyes as the pain and guilt washed over him again in waves. He still hadn't completely forgiven himself for what he'd done to Hunter or to Ric and Dave so hearing about the pain that Hunter had gone through wasn't the easiest thing for him to sit through. Especially coming from Shawn.
"Look, I'm s-"
"Did I say I was through?" When Randy closed him mouth Shawn sighed again, but his eyes softened. "You did what you did, and we all know it was a shitty thing to do…but I couldn't just find it in myself to hate you, not when I knew what you were going through. I know exactly what was fueling your decisions."
"What, greed?"
"There was that, but that greed was there only because you were doing everything you could to prove yourself to your inner demons. I don't pretend to know exactly who or what your demons are, but I can definitely identify with having them and we both know that. I saw them in your eyes the first fucking time I met you and every since then there's been so many times I've wanted to say something to you. I wanted to help you in some way, pull you out of it before you dug yourself into a hole as deep as the one I'm in, but I couldn't. I mean, how the hell do you take someone else's shovel when you can't even make yourself drop your own?"
Randy nodded sincerely as a moment of deep understanding passed between him and Shawn. There was some unseen bond between them now and they both knew it, something pulling them closer to each other than they'd been before. They shared a problem that most other people didn't have, or at least didn't admit to having, and it was a relief to know that there was at least one other person who could fully understand. Someone who experienced firsthand the pain, anger, and frustration of never being able to squash that voice inside that told you you weren't there yet and that you never would be.
"Thanks for caring, man."
"How could I not care about you, Randy, you're my ex-lover's lover," Shawn said with a teasing laugh, the light back in his eyes.
"Oh, so of course that means me and you just have to be the best of friends," Randy said with playful sarcasm.
"Such is life in the WWE."
"Correction," Randy said with a smile, "such is life when you're involved with a Kliq member."
"We always have been a little weird," Shawn said with a soft smile.
At this time, Hunter stepped around the same corner Randy had and froze when he saw Shawn and Randy talking. Finding it an interesting situation, Hunter leaned against the wall to listen. Randy's back was to Hunter so he never noticed, but Shawn looked right at the younger blonde for a second before deciding to go on with the conversation. He didn't care if Hunter heard anything or not and he'd probably like to hear most of it anyway.
However, at about the same time Hunter walked up behind Randy, Chris Jericho walked around the corner at the other end of the hall behind Shawn. When he saw Shawn and Randy talking and Hunter leaning against the wall a few feet behind the two friends, he himself took a keen interest in the conversation and leaned against the wall behind Shawn. He and Randy made eye contact for a second before Randy turned back to Shawn seemingly unperturbed that the Canadian was eavesdropping. Chris gave Hunter a quick, sly smile over both Shawn and Randy's shoulders before focusing on what was being said.
"I don't think weird is exactly the right word for the Kliq, but you guys really are great."
"Thanks, I'll be sure to pass the compliment along to the rest of them." Shawn's eyes grew serious then. "How are you doing now that you and Hunter are back together?"
"Are you asking me whether or not I'm gonna freak out and hurt him again?"
Shawn clearly heard the defensiveness in Randy's voice and smiled gently. "I'm asking you how you're doing, but feel free to answer both of those questions if you want to."
Reassured that Shawn wasn't attacking him, Randy smiled sheepishly before the smile turned soft and a bit lovesick. "I'm healing, Shawn."
"I can tell. He's good for you."
"Yeah he is. Before him it was so fucking bad, I never thought anyone could love someone like me. My self-esteem was nonexistent and in my mind I was the worst person in the whole world in every single way. And then…then he was just there. I'd been jumping from guy to guy looking for something that would make me feel loved or beautiful or good or happy for just one night. I'd never found anything like that until the night we had sex. After that it was just one amazing day after another and I guess I panicked or something because everything was going good, too fucking good. I wasn't exactly used to that and I guess I had to do something to fuck it up."
"I know what you mean," Shawn said feeling the familiar twinge of guilt deep inside for what he'd let slip through his fingers where Hunter was concerned. They'd put that behind them and moved on, but there was still a tiny bit of regret buried somewhere in his heart.
"He never blamed you, Shawn."
"I know that." Shawn didn't have to look at Hunter to know that he'd find nothing but forgiveness in those hazel eyes so he concentrated on Randy instead of chancing a glance at his ex. "He's one of the most understanding men I've ever met. That's why he took you back even though almost everybody was telling him to move on."
"I still don't know why he didn't listen to them," Randy admitted softly. "He could've had anybody he wanted."
"True," Shawn answered with a quirky smile, "but he didn't want anybody else, Orton. I know Hunter better than almost anybody else in the world and if it's one thing I know about him, it's that he loves you. He loves you so much it's damn near nauseating. He'd kill and die for you, easily."
"I love him too. He's just…he's so…I don't even have words for him."
"There aren't any," Shawn said smiling softly at Hunter over Randy's shoulder.
"What about you," Randy asked suddenly.
"What about me?"
"You've been looking a whole lot better these days."
"I feel better. I still got a long way to go, but I'm definitely taking some steps in the right direction."
"What do you owe your improvement to?"
"Chris."
"Jericho," Randy asked in surprise as he cut a glance to the blonde with the goofy smile on his face behind Shawn.
"Yeah," Shawn said with a slight blush much to Randy and Hunter's amusement. The man hadn't blushed in years.
"That's great, but I thought you two were just fucking around."
"Yeah so did I. Apparently blonde blue-eyed Canadian guys have a way of getting right up under your skin when you're not paying attention."
"You love him?"
"Against my better judgment," Shawn groaned, his bright smile showing his true feelings. "He's not like anybody I've ever met you know? He has this way of being the person who'll give you a swift kick in the ass when you need it but he'll never turn away from you if you need a shoulder to cry on. He won't take shit from anyone, but he's so fucking compassionate it breaks your heart." Shawn sighed in mock disgust, "Listen to me, I sound like a damn Lifetime movie or some shit. I need to stop hanging around Maven and Nidia."
"Probably," Hunter said finally making his presence known. Randy spun around so fast he almost made himself dizzy. "The way they talk about each other could make you sick."
"They're not as bad as Adam and Jason," Chris laughed picking up Hunter's thread of conversation.
Shawn covered his face with his hands. "How long have you been there?"
Chris practically skipped up behind Shawn and wrapped his arms around his waist. "Long enough to know I've pulled the great HBK off the market." Tenderly he added, "I told you I was gonna make you love me."
Shawn turned in his arms and kissed the tip of his nose. "I just wanted to pretend that I had a choice."
Chris made a big show of rolling his eyes with an overly-dramatic sigh any drama princess would be proud of. "Men."
"You're lucky I love you, Jericho."
"You're lucky I love you, Michaels."
"Stalemate then?"
"I think we need to find a way to end this debate. We can figure it out in your personal dressing-room…with the lockable door and thick walls."
"Good idea. See you guys later," Shawn called over his shoulder as he and Chris rushed off around the corner in search of his dressing-room.
Randy and Hunter watched them go with amused smiles before turning to each other and sharing a short soft kiss.
"Feel better now that you've talked to him," Hunter asked softly.
"Yeah, I guess I just needed to make sure everything was okay there. I'm glad him and Chris found each other."
"Me too, he needed someone who would be more firm with him. I just couldn't find it in me to give him that kick in the ass when he looked so damn sad and defeated. He'd been through too much shit and I'd known him too long to not just let him cry and wallow in his pain. That's why we eventually broke it off. As long as we stayed together he would never heal and I'd keep feeling guilty about not being able to help him. We just weren't healthy for each other."
"That's sad."
"Not really. We got out before our friendship could fall apart and we both ended up in relationships with amazing guys we couldn't love more. I think it all worked out for the best."
Randy couldn't find a reason to argue. "I love you, Hunter."
"Love you too, baby."
END
